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Originally Posted by Chesby05
Ok no you weren't judging her perhaps - but it kind of sounded a bit like that!
And my pregnancy is in high-risk category as well. Which is why I am being monitored closely the whole way through it. But that is due to my extremely high risk of developing post-natal depression after delivery and because of some medication I'm on, not for a more common reason such as pre-eclampsia or anything like that. I also have a low-lying anterior placenta, which could mean a caesarian delivery.
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That sucks. C-sections are not too rough to recover from (according to the wife). But they can leave a nasty scar if it is an emergency C. And the vertical scar does not heal up as well. But that is a minor concern. I can not remember what the preexisting condition was that caused her to go early. But she had a still birth when she was younger due to a placental abruption. But she was able to carry Corrie (our oldest) almost to term, and Patrick was just shy of a month early. Our youngest was the rough one. She had internal and external cervical and placental bleeding since five weeks. And preterm labor started around ten weeks. Then at 21 weeks she abrupted, but luckily she went to the hospital the night prior because of bad contractions and they saw the warning signs.
And if it sounded like I was judging her, I am sorry, but she kind of said it in her own words. But anyway.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chesby05
I'm not aborting (obviously) - not all high risk pregnancies should abort.
What I'm saying in this woman's case which is different to your own is that she does not have the support network, the relationship with her husband, the security or anything else that you had to be able to make your extremely difficult situation tenable. And that does need to be taken into consideration - absolutely. If you are already at risk, and the circumstances of your life place you at even more risk - which does include mental and emotional risk, which does affect the health of the baby - then abortion is an option that should be considered. It's not the best option, but that's life sometimes. We have to judge each case on its individual merit and I still believe that the life and well being of the mother can and should sometimes outweigh that of the unborn child.
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That is good that you are going through with it. And while I am not for abortion, I am also not about telling others how to live their life. I do not believe that one life is worth more than another. But not all people see it that way.
When I think of abortion, I think not only of my son, but of myself (yeah selfish I know), I turned out pretty good and I was adopted. I am sure it was hard for my biological mother, but I was better off where I grew up, and most definitely better off alive than dead. I know that I would give up all to give my children an opportunity to thrive.
My brother was also adopted (our mom could not have kids because of the medication she has to take for psoriasis), his bio was a woman who cheated on her husband and got pregnant, we do not know her whole story (closed adoption, he did try to find her, but closed adoptions are rather difficult, he did not want to reconnect, just wanted to say thanks.). But lucky for us she did not abort. She too ended up getting divorced. But she gave him a shot, and he is twenty five now, and just started his own business. Has a beautiful wife, and a son that is just younger than our youngest.
I am not trying to lay a guilt trip, just offering our story up for advise.
That is C-D-P's take on things. All we can do is voice opinions and let her make her own decision.
But echoing Herk, I do not want my money paying for that, and luckily in this case it is not.