Oh good Spanky, watch your Uni results plummet and overseas students dry up when the place of highest learning becomes your cliched Old Western Saloon scene.

Shifty eyes between book covers, one hand by your hip and another on the pen. Careful what you say in Art class- "Draw" might just result in a spontaneous piece about man's inhumanity to man.

And don't keep your reading glasses on the inside of your coat...