It's also a little known fact that Jesus was a linguist. The carpenter thing was a sidejob he got suckered into by some idiot friend that never did bother paying him back... taking advantage of the whole give without expecting in return" thing.

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"Man lives in the sunlit world of that which he believes to be reality. But unseen by most is an underworld, a place that is just as real... but not as brightly lit... A DARK SIDE!"
-opening from Tales From the Darkside