date rape is a fake crime....

I wish you were right.

 

Have an example to say otherwise?

 

I had 2 relationships with women who were some 20 years older than I. (I guess they are the ones called "cougars".) Lucky for me, I figured what they were up to when they were talking about "commitment" holding a glass of whatever that we were drinking.

 

You are so so weird.

 

Maybe I am ... just curious, after all the stuff I wrote at Political Forum, why am I weird now?

 

No you've been that way for a long time.

 

Well, I guess I don't understand it any better than you do then. Logical would be that they play the field and don't care for much more. They have the money and everything they may want. But things don't always keep on as per logical expectations in my observation. I admit, I am clueless. Any idea? And legislation is NOT on my side, definitely, even though I don't seek out people.

 

You're confusing me.

 

Oops, don't join the club, I am already confused enough for 2 people or even for a score of army soldiers. What if I just say, that legal abuse exists and it is possible to use it in criminal law too? And I accept that my scenarios are indeed rare, in line with your observation.

 

I'd ask you to expand.

 

I REALLY enjoyed this discussion with you.

Now I must turn into a pumpkin at this past-midnight hour, but I will be happy to expand on my observations with you tomorrow.

Have a GOOD night.

 

I think I date raped a girl last night....ironically, I was even more drunk than she was....does that mean sheshe date raped me more than I date raped her?

I think jaegar is like ghb for me. I feel violated

 

After rape, you mean; there's no plague of false rape charges in the US. Indeed, as women are STILL pressured not to report and press charges, and the bar STILL remains high for perps to be brought to justice by a misogynist justice system and citizenry... I'd say not nearly enough men are having the smack-down placed upon them.

Yeah, rape is SO funny bro... riiiiiiight...

 

Totally idiotic.

A. Who is pressuring women not to report rapes? Hell, who is even telling women not to falsely report rapes?

B. What's this high bar you're talking about? If a man is arrested and charged with rape he is quite likely to be convicted.

 

The rapists (who are usually someone they know), their parents and friends (who may have connection with the rapist, or don't want to be embarrassed, etc), police (who don't want the work, municipal leaders and colleges who don't want the negative stats, etc.), or prosecutors (who usually see such cases as unwinnable, note the Duke case)...

Evidence? Mine says otherwise:

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/11/09/cbsnews_investigates/main5590118.shtml

http://justsayingthat.wordpress.com...ow-rape-conviction-rates-what-should-be-done/

As for why the bar is high, the comments on this thread attest to why: the woman is nearly always blamed for having done or not done something that led to the rape (got drunk, short skirt, being slutty, etc)... shifting the onus off of the rapist, who is given undue sympathy.

 

Take Koreans and john Bobbitt.....she accused him of rape and he was acquitted....yet when she cut his penis off, she was given a pass on it "because she was raped"

Even the accusation of rape was sufficient in ruining this guys Rep and even allowed for crimes against him to be justified.

 

Koreans? What?

 

I am a guy but I do think that rapists should be sentenced using an expedited death penulty process. It is important that the raped woman gets closure sooner rather than later, and then she can move on with her life.

The death penulty is not only for providing the closure for her but also because there is no possibility to "cure" a rapist, such thing never succeeded.

It would be interesting to start a government program of some sort that would study how a rape transforms a woman into a different person. This way we could get some insight whether a rape victim can be cured.

 

Trouble is... with misogyny still hardwired into the cultural milieu, juries would have a tough time sending a man to death for rape.

These are well-studied, though not necessarily heeded by counselors and authorities:

http://web4health.info/en/answers/sex-rape-effects.htm

http://www.secasa.com.au/index.php/workers/25/30

"Burgess and Holmstrem studied 109 women who attended the Boston City Hospital in 1974 complaining of rape. They collected their data at the time of initial presentation at the hospital and again 3 months later. They documented the "rape trauma syndrome". They found two phases of adjustment following rape or attempted rape. They call these the acute phase and the long term reorganisation phase, both of which are stress reactions to a life threatening situation.

Immediately following the rape they found that an equal number of women had an "expressed" style where they showed feelings of fear by crying, smiling, sobbing or a "controlled" style where the woman was calm and subdued. The primary emotion expressed by victims is one of fear. Most any say that they felt they were going to be killed or badly injured.

When an individual is subjected to extreme stress, psychological mechanisms are evoked in an attempt to cope with this stress. If the stress is powerful then the defence mechanisms she uses, must be equally powerful. Thus the rape victim may experience emotional shock where she has an exaggerated sense of unreality and disassociation. Things seem unreal to her, and she may have difficulty attending to environmental stimuli. As well, women who have reported to police, have a number of immediate tasks to perform: the making of a statement, identifying the alleged offender either from photos or with an identikit, repeatedly recalling details of the assault, under-taking a medical examination and so on. Most victims try to remain in control of themselves so that they can adequately perform these tasks. It is our experience that women who react in a controlled way are equally as traumatized as those who act in an expressed manner. Unfortunately the extent of the trauma experienced by these women may go unrecognised by their family/friends or professionals and they may receive less support and treatment. In addition, these women may not be believed by family and others who subscribe to the myth that rape victims to be genuine must exhibit histrionic behaviour.

Somatic reactions developed included physical trauma, skeletal muscle tension, gastrointestinal irritability, genitourinary complaints and sleep pattern changes.

Emotional reactions include fear, humiliation, anger, guilt/shame and feelings of degradation and powerlessness. Mood swings and enhanced emotional liability may occur. Increased irritability with, and suspiciousness of other people may also be present. The issue of trust may be important in the counselling process. Given that the victim's trust in people has been betrayed by the rapist, it may make it more difficult for her to trust others. The counsellor needs to indicate that she can empathaize with the victim's feelings, that she can listen and acknowledge the intense emotions the victim has, and encourage rather than suppress discussions of these. The victim may displace her anger onto the counsellor, police, hospital or family. She may be dominated by feelings of helplessness and powerlessness. She needs to be encouraged to make decisions for herself in order to learn to feel some control over her life again. Crisis counselling which is issues orientated is an effective management procedure, and the counselling needs of the victim include ventilation and clarification of issues. Only 15% of victims at the hospital continue in counselling after 6 interviews. The situation is a crisis, most victims are psychologically healthy people, and the treatment of choice is crisis intervention so this is appropriate.

Burgess and Holmstrom report that in the reorganisation phase women develop increased motor activity, changing their jobs, home or lifestyle as a defensive reaction to the assault. Nightmares relating to the life threatening nature of the assault and the powerlessness and alienation are common. The development of phobic reactions to situations reminiscent of the rape also occur. Some mistrust of men with subsequent avoidance and hesitation, along with a variety of sexual difficulties may develop. Victims are often concerned about the effects of the rape on their close interpersonal relationships wondering how this will affect them.

It is important to discuss with the victim the types of problems, feelings and areas of difficulty that she could experience in the weeks and months following the assault. Most victims, have no point of reference upon which to evaluate the normality of their response. Provision of this information enables the victim to place her rape related reactions into perspective."

 

So alchohol absolves one of accountability? If you endanger others by driving whilst intoxicated, you are rightfully punished. Likewise, if two drunken individuals partake in a sexual act, the consent given beforehand cannot be retracted afterwards. You are responsible for what you put into your body and thus you are, within reason, wholly responsible for the consequences. To suggest otherwise is quite absurd.

 

Do you know what happens to North Korean women in who seek asylum in China?

 

The legal and moral onus is on the rapist, not the victim.

 

In what way is this contradictory to my own post?

 

I assume you meant to say, "...on the accused rapist...." Oh, wait, no, you probably didn't.

 

(an example of undue sympathy for those who rape)

It doesn't matter if the woman was behaving irresponsibly... if she says no, or is in no condition to say yes, then the man is committing rape. Do we blame robbery victims for walking through bad neighborhoods?