I'm not normally one to post about this stuff, but I recently read an article that really made me just shake my head in disbelief. I saw this article in the Hollywood Reporter: Emma Corrin Is Interested in Male Characters as a Nonbinary Actor – The Hollywood Reporter I have no problem if you want to be called he or she, even if you look the opposite of those two pronouns, but "they"? That's just going a bit too far for me. "They" implies there is more than one, so are you a group? Again, I do not care what you think it is, but a "they" is always plural. Maybe this actress should just be called "it", seems to have worked just fine for this thespian.
It seems like so much about so little. I'll stick with the good ol' first, second, and third person singular and plural.
I don't know what the hell "non-binary" means. Wouldn't it be easier just to say bisexual or asexual? Our language is not designed for this, more so with the Latin language where every noun is either feminine or masculine.
"They" is a word, I have no problem using, for a single person. I got in the habit way, waaay back, when "he or she" came on the scene; if it was going to be seen as sexist, to refer to any person whose gender I did not know, as just "he," I was no way going to turn that one syllable, into three-- especially as awkward, as that pronoun buffet, always sounded to me. He or she, became "they."
I don't disagree with your feelings, or am not any less in the loop, with all of these new designations, but how often, really, does it come up, that you refer to your "heterosexual" friend, or your "bi-curious" co-worker? I mean, if things aren't at a sexual stage, in some relationship, it doesn't seem to me, there should be reason for me to need to even know peoples' sexual preferences, and inner genders, much less make reference to them.
People can be what they want to be. Not really my business. Where I have a problem is the part where I'm expected to change my own tiny little world to suit others. We probably all grew up hearing common usage of they as a singular and non-specific pronoun such as saying, "If anyone has a problem, they can file a complaint." But what happens when we do that in other situations? Say, for instance, "Mary was in a crowded room when they realized they left their mask in their car." Who did what?
You are absolutely correct. This to me appears like something that occurs in the parallel dimension we call social media, but it does little to make communication easier.
Exactly. Whatever people who engage in this wordplay think they are doing, it only brings about more confusion, not less. The way I was taught English, people are he, she, or it -- though the last one was used as a kind of pejorative, but nowhere as offensive as queer. Now, queers in, and it doesn't tell me much. Not that I've ever had an introduction with somebody who introduces themselves as queer, but if you identify as queer when I didn't ask, I'm still not going to know what you mean by that term, nor why you would be compelled for me to know it.
That problem seems not insurmountable. It really comes down to the speaker; I mean, I have fairly often known a person to be telling a story, involving either multiple males, or multiple females, who still can't help using the same pronouns for everyone: "she told her that she didn't know why she couldn't change her mind, about her mother coming to see them..."
Okay, but how is that different than asexual? I grew up with an aunt that was asexual. She never dated. She was always modest and demure. The only time I ever saw her get hot for a man was when Tom Jones was performing on TV.
I would have received an F in the third grade if I wrote a sentence like that. Admittedly, I still worry about my prepositions.
Oh--good one! I think we all do that at times. No, the problem is not insurmountable, but I have read too many news articles lately that muddy the waters of understanding in an effort to not offend. All I want is clarity. And what would it be like if all those old novels got burned for offensive language? The confusion sets in . . .
Because there's more than just bi and asexual. There's hetero, homo, and likely several more. Asexual is in general terms, one not interested in sex, period. Or very low interest in any sex.
I have yet to encounter any of this, out in the real world, and have a hard time imagining that it will ever be a thing that will become generally familiar, much less an expected courtesy. In fact, watch this crazy ridiculous video, from the t.v. show Reno 911. At first, it seemed to me as if all these pronoun examples were just being made up, by the comedian; but I think it was just a matter of the truth, in this case, being so ludicrous, in itself, that all is required to lampoon it, is to keep a straight face. My biggest takeaway, had simply been being impressed, that the presenter could keep all of these straight (so to speak). Does it mean I'm clueless, if this just seems like something that is going on, only within some tiny universe of the community?
"They" is used all the time to refer to a single individual. This was the case long before gender identity was a popular issue.
Thanks, I appreciate the link. One thing it mentions is if the sex is unknown that is when it is appropriate to use they, but that would be difficult and impractical on someone who looks like Emma Corrin, who looks female. How you present yourself to the world usually dictates what gender people will call you.
I don't think anyone should be faulted for using the pronoun of someone's appearance when they don't know if the person prefers something different.
I agree. I think because this person is a celebrity, articles like the one I referenced in the OP, enforce their preferred choice to the masses, which makes sense, but is impractical in everyday life for theys that are not in the public eye. It will be fascinating to see if this is a fad or an actual change to the English language. Only time will tell.
I do think if a person you interact with on a regular basis, asks to be referred to using a certain pronoun, that we should try to respect that.
