My Second Life and other Secrets

Discussion in 'Member Casual Chat' started by HereWeGoAgain, Nov 25, 2016.

  1. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Well-Known Member

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    A thread for those who have lived more than one life.

    Life used to be so simple. I was married and figured I would always be married. I was a loyal husband, worked hard, tried my best to be a good son, a good brother, a good friend, a good uncle, and I worked hard to help make the world a better place. I was a boy scout in a man's life. I was naive. I was betrayed. I had been blind. I saw what I wanted to believe. And slowly I went down hill. Happiness became a distant memory. Sex was but a distant memory. My health spun out of control. I spent almost all of my time working alone and watching desperately as my business collapsed with the economy. I found myself going broke, desperately lonely, and living with a woman who had become a complete stranger. Eventually I realized that after over 20 years, I had no idea who I had married. She was never who she pretended to be.

    My best friend died, another went nuts, and another was lost to booze. My family was hit with a series of health crises and deaths and what was left fell apart. One day I realized that I had nothing. In spite of my best efforts and a lifetime of loyalty, I had no one. Everyone and everything I cared about was gone. For months I fell asleep with tears streaming down my cheeks as I contemplated the best way to end it all. And I very nearly did. Then, like a bolt out of the blue, I found a reason to live. And so began the wildest ride I have ever had in my life. I began a new life I never could have imagined.

    Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Give a man a beautiful young woman and he regains the will to live. And so it was. I found the will to live through youth and beauty. I found more happiness than I have ever known. I saw one amazing young lady for three years and was truly living in a dream the entire time. I didn't know it was possible to be so happy. She was a goddess. She was an angel. She was a soul mate. She was my heart. But with 25 years between us, as I knew it must, that eventually ended. So I moved on, have met about 100 women, dated a dozen, and found another young beauty who fills me with joy.

    I don't know if I will ever find the kind of love I had for three glorious years. I suspect a love like that only comes along once in a lifetime if we're lucky. But I have also learned to live in the moment. I have learned that permanence is an illusion.I have learned to take joy and sorrow as it comes and to cherish them both. After all, great sorrow can only come when we lose that which gives us great joy. I have learned that things don't bring happiness. I have learned that for many, marriage is an illusion. I have learned that life is precious and we need to make the most of ever moment. And I learned that sometimes happiness is only found when we cast aside expectations and a lifetime beliefs, and break all the rules.

    I have lived more in the last 5 years than I did in the previous 45. Most people would be shocked if they knew the entire story. But it is my story and my secret life. And I finally learned how to be happy.
     
  2. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Donor

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    I thought this was gonna turn out to be another 'And then I found Gard!' story.
     
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  3. Shangrila

    Shangrila staff Past Donor

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    You'd be surprised how quickly the 'search' ends when they do, and peace begins. :) But that is a story for another day.
    To the OP
    I think that, no matter who your friends and family and circumstances are, happiness comes from within. Bad and good things alike happen in one's life. The trick is learning to live with the good and the bad. All the best to you.
     
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  4. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Donor

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    Maybe he should lower his sights and find a real woman with charisma and femininity - beautiful women are almost always shallow, self-obsessed, and generally 'bad news'. Oh and I forgot the most important attribute - loyalty. Looks like he hasn't had much luck in that particular department?
     
  5. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Well-Known Member

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    Beautiful women are shallow? That is a very shallow perspective. She was in every way the most amazing woman I have ever met. And I was as much in love as a man can possibly be. It was glorious. It was heaven on earth. And three years with her was better than all the previous years of my life combined. If I had died the moment she left, my time with her would have made my life worth living.

    As for finding a "real" woman, don't believe it for a moment. I married a "real" woman and it was the biggest mistake of my life. For me it is now all about the magic. Magic is what makes life worth living. When I see her naked and coming to join me in bed, my heart soars and I have to catch my breath. And when I am holding my young beauty in my arms, I never want to let go. Those are the moments that give me a reason to get up each day.

    When my first true love left, I made finding that magic the biggest priority of my life. It became my mission in life. After something over 500 online contacts, over 100 coffee dates, and another 30 or 40 regular dates, I found magic again.

    The key is accepting that one day I will have to let her go. That is what makes it all possible. I am too old to hope to keep her. That would be unfair of me. But we can have a few great years together.
     
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  6. Texan

    Texan Well-Known Member

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    I was lonely as a single guy. Maybe I just got lucky. We made it to 25 years last month. Our boys are growing up. Oldest is out of the house, the second is home, but paying his own way, and the 3rd is an expensive high school freshman. We keep him stocked in saxophones and baseball gear and he excels at both.

    I complain about my wife spending money, but she is worth every penny I will ever have. She keeps me on the straight and narrow and feeds me well. She's as beautiful now as she was in '91. I just wish I had the stamina I used to have.
     
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  7. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Well-Known Member

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    I'm not knocking marriage entirely. Sometimes things work and about 55% of the time things don't. If the right woman comes along anything is possible. But I have no desire to get married so I have no reason to seek out women closer to my age. From my pov, there is no reason to settle. So why not put "exceedingly hot" at the top of the list of requirements? And it is hard to beat the beauty youth but I have dated older women as well. Beyond, that, many younger women appreciate the special adoration an older man has to offer. And they don't come with all the baggage.

    This is so much more enjoyable than all of the drama of regular dating. Because she doesn't see me as a potential husband, I am not judged by the same standards as would be a young man. Likewise, I can just enjoy being with her and not worry about whether or not I could live with this or that. My first love and I went three years and NEVER had a serious fight or even a heated argument. We just enjoy being together and giving each other pleasure. I love to spoil a woman and they love to be spoiled. It all works wonderfully when the chemistry is right. But I won't lie. I had to work my butt off to find that something special once again. It took over a year. But I know it when I feel it. When I hold and her feel like I could hang on forever, when being next to her makes me feel high, and when the sex is natural and great from almost day one, I know, this is the one.

    This one was promising right away. She walked in and oh my, she is gorgeous! And then half way through our first coffee date, she leaned forward and whispered, "I have a really strong sex drive". Oh darn said I! Let me write that down!!! :D
     
  8. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Donor

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    Sorry but I believe you're fantasizing.
     
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  9. Johnny Brady

    Johnny Brady New Member

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    I know the feeling mate, I've had a "drought" for 14 years now (sniffle)
     
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  10. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Well-Known Member

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    About what? Do you mean the whole thing? LOL. Obviously you are a woman.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Damn, I went ten years and it very nearly drove me to suicide. I don't know where you are in life but if this is unacceptable to you, do whatever it takes. You will be a new man!!! Go to Reno is you have to. There are tons of escorts online [don't know if it's legal where you live]

    Living without sex was slowly but surely killing me.

    haha, you are in GB. So I guess it would be Amsterdam, not Reno, for you. :D Not good. Escorts in Amsterdam pull down some crazy prices.
     
  11. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Donor

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    Well seeing as you're obviously obsessed with sex then I guess that it is 'the whole thing'? I'm an alpha male.
     
  12. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Well-Known Member

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    Anyone who says he's an alpha male, by definition isn't.

    Obsessed, okay, I'm obsessed. So what. At least I'm alive. And it keeps me young. I'm ten years younger than I was ten years ago. And I'm in the best shape I've been in since my early twenties. I'm fit and buff and make guys 20 years younger look bad at the gym. As obsessions go, it's not a bad one.

    Nothing makes a guy work harder than the promise of sex with a hot young beauty... and the threat of having to disrobe in front of her! :omg:
     
  13. tecoyah

    tecoyah Well-Known Member

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    The joys of life are never found outside of yourself...though the ingredients always are.
     
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  14. Johnny Brady

    Johnny Brady New Member

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    There are some very friendly women on street corners near the dockyard a mile from where I live but they don't interest me me because I'm the weird sort who wants a relationship, not just a 5-minute stand..:)
    Anyway I regularly date nice women in my dreams, for example the other night I dreamt I staggered into Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman's surgery with a rattler bite to my calf, and she had to (gulp) suck out the poison, then sit up with me all night dabbing my fevered brow with a damp cloth as I tossed and turned in delirium while whispering in my ear "Hang in there baby, don't you go dying on me, we'll ride it out together"..:)
     
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  15. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Donor

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  16. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Well-Known Member

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    One word: Eeeew!
     
  17. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Well-Known Member

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    Men have needs.

    When I first became sexually active again, every encounter was like a religious experience. It generally took me several days to come down from the oxytocin high. I threw myself right into a threesome with two extremely beautiful young women. It was absolutely overwhelming! When they first walked in I had to sit down because my legs almost gave out!!! :banana: True story! It was almost too much to take at that point.

    There is no doubt in my mind that for some men at least, sex is a fundamental need for good mental health. And in fact this is in line with much of the literature. If you read about happiness and depression, sex is usually right at the top of the list of things that help. What shocked me was how fast and dramatic the effect. I thought I just wanted to get laid. I didn't know it would bring me back to life and give me a zest for life again. It was immediately transformative. In one night I was a changed man. And I never could have imagined the life that would follow. It was beyond my wildest dreams.
     
  18. tecoyah

    tecoyah Well-Known Member

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    Granted Sex is an absolutely wonderful and beautiful chemically stimulating experience that can induce euphoria with mere thought. It also creates a measure of mental youth and pure life satisfaction....this is one of the ingredients found outside ones self. Within ourselves we find the core reasons sex accomplishes the many fantastic qualities it inspires. As for the whole "Beautiful Young Woman" concept, this is in my experience a double edged sword that often creates damaging back wounds....My wife is 11 years older than myself, looks twenty yrs. younger than she is, and has the mentality that allows for stability and thus happiness.
    Also this "Alpha Male" garbage is actually quite sad in that by claiming this status a man immediately defines himself otherwise. Much like respect it is something given and not taken.
     
  19. Johnny Brady

    Johnny Brady New Member

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    But as you pointed out earlier, there are plenty of prossies/escorts/massage parlours/online dating sites etc, yet there are still depressed people around.
    I think it's because raw sex without love and friendship doesn't appeal to many people and they regard it as meaningless and unfulfilling, including me, so they don't go in for it.
    For example I was walking through dockland one sunny afternoon a while back and a nice young lady on a street corner fluttered her eyelashes at me, so I tried to start a friendship going by saying with a smile- "Hi, do you want to come for a walk on the seafront with me?", and she replied "Er...no thanks, I'm working", so I said "okay" and walked off..:)

    PS- I've been with about 4 prossies in my life many years ago (not at the same time!) but didn't enjoy it one bit, it was like trying to make love to cold impersonal sacks of potatoes, so I never bothered ever again.
     
  20. MrNick

    MrNick Banned

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    What, someone needs to get you a hooker or a wife or something.

    I don't understand the whole taboo idea in paying for sex...... Er not to pay at all because some chicks just like to hook up for sex...

    Sex with no strings attached is pretty worth it for both sides it's what you're looking for.

    Damn we have the internet for a reason lol. and clubs and even businesses that cater to people with certain "needs" lol.
     

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