Tasteless Humor 3, Lord How Many More?

I was in juvenile court, prosecuting a teen suspected of burglary, when the judge asked everyone to stand and state his or her name and role for the court reporter.

“Leah Rauch, deputy prosecutor,” I said.

“Linda Jones, probation officer.”

“Sam Clark, public defender.”

“John,” said the teen who was on trial. “I’m the one who stole the truck.”

 

Tropical Storm Sally has formed off the southwest coast of Florida and is expected to strengthen into a hurricane by Monday, the National Hurricane Center said Saturday.

Really Sally? Was this necessary?

 

Not the first time Sally and terrible wind have been mentioned in the same sentence.

 

It’s Chaos theory. I dropped a cup.

 

Could you send a little storm California's way? They could really use it.

 

To stir up the fires?

 

No, Trump is doing that

 

This is your great-grandma and great grandpa,” I told my grandson as I handed him a photo of my parents. “Do you think I look like them?”
He shook his head. “Not yet.”

 

How many council workers does it take to change a light bulb?
.
.
.
Definitely more than the six that are allowed to be in one place at a time.

 

A nun found herself walking through a questionable neighborhood one night on her way back to the convent. Nearing a bar, she saw a large, disreputable-looking man step outside. He began walking towards her, clearly swaying as a result of the many drinks he had undoubtedly just consumed.

Although the nun very much disapproved of overindulging in drink, she decided that this time, discretion was the better part of valor. She smiled at him and stepped to the side to pass him. Suddenly, the man hauled back and punched her in the face. As she fell back in shock and pain, he threw another punch. And another and another.

The last thing she heard before she passed out: "Ya ain't shhho ****in' tough tonight, arrrrrre ya Batman??"

 

You might want to look at this again after you have some coffee.

 

Two beggars
There were two beggars sitting side by side on a street in Mexico City. One had a cross in front of him, the other one the Star of David.

Many people went by, looked at both beggars, but only put money into the hat of the one sitting behind the cross.

A priest came by, stopped and watched many, many people give money to the beggar behind the cross, but none to the beggar behind the Star of David. Finally he went over to the beggar behind the Star of David and said: "Don't you understand? This is a Catholic country. People aren't going to give you money if you sit there with a Star of David in front of you, especially when you're sitting beside a beggar who has a cross. In fact, they would probably give to him triple the amount just out of spite to you."

The Star of David beggar listened to the priest and, turning to the cross beggar, said: "Moshe! Look who's trying to teach us marketing."

 

I understand memes aren't for the left.

You should fact check it with the manager.

 

Dude BOTH images are CNN screen captures one used in a Babylon Bee reporting what CNN said and the other in a CNN post. How on earth do you get stealing from Babylon Bee?

 

I hope you know that you're a horrible person. Walking the line between spoonerisms and puns will not save you from the gods.

 

He knows, oh how well he knows. But on this thread he has no shame.

But then none of us do.

 

I'd say "Show me nekkid pictures, but then I look at your avatar and know I'm afraid you have no shame."