Tasteless Humor

Discussion in 'Humor & Satire' started by Moi621, Jul 19, 2014.

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  1. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Yeah, right.
     
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2017
  2. garyd

    garyd Well-Known Member

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    Changing the subject completely: Out of New Mexico this morning, Gun battle in New Mexico library 2 killed two wounded.
    And of course the first thought in my diseased brain was "Damn the over due book fees are just a bit steep down that way."
     
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2017
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  3. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    Climate change snowflakes hate America.

    [​IMG]
     
  4. garyd

    garyd Well-Known Member

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    One of my wife's favorite comments on Harvey, Typical male wonders around in circles for three days and still won't ask directions...
     
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2017
  5. garyd

    garyd Well-Known Member

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    My favorite was "Damn drunken Pookahs are always stirring up trouble." Sadly most here won't get that one. The reference is to one of my all time favorite Jimmy Stewart movies by the same name.
     
  6. Moi621

    Moi621 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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  7. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Did you hear about the poker playing leper who threw in his hand?
     
  8. Moi621

    Moi621 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    And I made that one up too.
    When I read of the biggest, baddest, in Germany's control.
    A sick mind can be an infinite source of pleasure. It's the thought that counts. :lol:
     
  9. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    No but I knew one who saw a prostitute. He paid her well and told her to keep the tip.
     
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  10. Derideo_Te

    Derideo_Te Well-Known Member

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    But he won by default because the other lepers he was playing with laughed their heads off.
     
  11. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Yuck.
     
  12. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    WHAT?!?!?! That was my favorite joke in the 4th grade. :D

    ... okay maybe the 6th grade....
     
    Last edited: Sep 5, 2017
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  13. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    Patient: "I’m in a hospital! Why am I in here?" Doctor: "You’ve had an accident involving a bus." Patient: "What happened?" Doctor: "Well, I’ve got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first?" Patient: "Give me the bad news first." Doctor: "Your legs were injured so badly that we had to amputate both of them." Patient: "That’s terrible! What’s the good news?" Doctor: "There’s a guy in the next ward who made a very good offer on your slippers."
     
  14. gophangover

    gophangover Well-Known Member

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    What did Jeffery Dalhmer say to Lorena Bobbitt?...."You gonna eat that?"
     
  15. Moi621

    Moi621 Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    schadenfreude.jpg


    Moi's reply, "Schadenfreude, Why Not?"

    We got no drought relief in California from the Federals or anyone. :mad:
    So, yes to schadenfreude. So au naturale.

    And if Houston wasn't' sufficiently joyful, Irma's gonna sink La Florida.
    Parts are only 2 - 5 feet above sea level and the storm swell could be 10 feet. :lol: :crazy:
    Will the Cajun Navy appear again?
     
    Last edited: Sep 5, 2017
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  16. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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    IMG_2026.JPG
    Rough, but apt.
     
  17. Derideo_Te

    Derideo_Te Well-Known Member

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    Apparently the reason that women don't blink during foreplay is because there isn't enough time!
     
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  18. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    Speak for yourself. The women I see not only blink, they keep their eyes closed the entire time.
     
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  19. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    My two sugar babies and I [I can hardly believe I'm saying that] were talking about what to do if we are out and run into a relative or family friend who wouldn't understand the situation. I told them to say I'm their crazy uncle. I'll just keep saying I want to see the horses.
     
  20. Derideo_Te

    Derideo_Te Well-Known Member

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    You missed the joke? :eek:

    Wife of an airline pilot I know told me that she isn't worried about him screwing the stewardesses because it would mean he would have to engage in foreplay.
     
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  21. HereWeGoAgain

    HereWeGoAgain Banned

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    No, you did! :D
     
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  22. Nerd of Liberty

    Nerd of Liberty Active Member

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  23. Sallyally

    Sallyally Well-Known Member Donor

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  24. gophangover

    gophangover Well-Known Member

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    A Rabbi and a Catholic priest were flying some under privileged children to a charity function for them when the engines went out on the plane. There were only two parachutes and the plane was going down fast. The Rabbi grabbed the chutes and tossed one to the priest and said, "Let's get out of here!" The priest asked, "What about the kids?" The Rabbi said, "Screw the kids!" The priest asked, "Do you think we have time?"
     
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  25. Robert

    Robert Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.
    The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new makeup; buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.
    The man was impressed.
    The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.

    Again, the man is impressed.
    The third invests the money in the stock market She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5,000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.

    Obviously, the man was impressed.
    The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her.
    Then he married the one with the biggest Boobs.

    Boobs.
    Men are like that, you know.
    And on another note!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them!
     
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