Years ago I decided to write a book. Recent conversations here prompted me to search for the manuscript for fun, unfortunately I cannot find it, so I decided to start again. I how remember why I never finished it, I needed material to go forward so I request a bit of help. I will present the basic premise but I would like questions that prompt my input, which I will then incorporate in the book....so here goes: The Man Book Over many thousands of years and uncountable uncomfortable situations the male of the human species has accomplished one of the most difficult and complex feats in the history of history, he has begun to grasp the female of the species. I say begun because the quest is never ending and evolves daily, entirely dependent on the wiles and persona of each and every woman and the ignorance of the man who interacts with her. Though this tome cannot and does not pretend to answer the unanswerable question of “what should I do?” it may assist in some moment of desperate need of protection or defense. The concept of Man and Woman is found throughout time in many differing stories and literature but always incorporates the basic premise of confusion in some respect by the man at the whim of the woman and continues to this day. This is not a bad thing and in fact is part of the incredible draw and power she holds over him. In the following pages it is slightly possible she will be diminished in her power though the draw is likely to increase which gives her power…..uh…forget that part. My hope is that this pile of accumulated knowledge and experience may someday lead to a man somewhere preventing or escaping one of the billions of stupid things she knows we do. Men are Stupid and Women are Crazy Women are Crazy because Men are Stupid. Men are Stupid because Women say so. 1 Chapter One The starter course One of the most important things to understand going in is just this: You will never “Win” an argument again. If by chance you feel you have presented a sound case and explained your position with incredible detail and competency, rendering your vanquished foe incapable of mounting further defense….You will shortly be feeling the effects of your actual loss. Women contain within them the Vengencible gland which is almost invisible to even X-ray but undeniably there. Over the next few Hours/Days/Weeks blood flow increases and the brain begins a function referred to as “Hegonnapayferdat” which will eventually result in a mostly silent yet sinister background manipulation seldom noted until completed. The end result of this benign yet terrible mental activity invariably leaves the male in a state of confused panic when realization kicks in.
Since you requested a little help here is my two cents worth. Therein lies the core of the problem highlighted above! The answer is "it depends" on the circumstances. Here is a guideline to when a man should and should not DO something. First off we need to understand the problem. No, it is not something that needs to be "fixed". The problem is that we males of the species always ASSUME that something needs to be fixed. When dealing with women that assumption is wrong 99% of the time. Men fix things whereas women DISCUSS things that might, or might not, need fixing. Just as men have this automatic reaction to fixing something that is wrong women have an automatic reaction to discussing something that is wrong. So the answer to the problem of "what should I do" is to sit down and do nothing more than LISTEN! After a couple of decades of listening some men will be able to discern the difference between a problem that actually needs fixing (e.g. the dryer doesn't dry the clothes properly) as opposed to her just venting about your failure to put the toilet seat down. She already knows that can't be fixed because inevitably you will forget again and leave it up. All she needs is the opportunity to bemoan the fact that you are a thoughtless jerk who doesn't care enough about her to remember to always put the toilet seat down. FTR if you do find a woman who doesn't care that you leave the toilet seat up you should hang on to her for dear life because they are extremely few and far between. Needless to say something else that you do, or don't do, will annoy her.
Synopsis of Chapter Two Appetizers. After many instances of attempting to remedy the "problems" every woman will present vocally to the man, an eventual understanding of tone and body language will present itself. These indicators vary dramatically from female to female and often change as we gain understanding just to keep us off guard. You may note a rigid posture, squinted eyes, lack of lip curvature, or a shift in frequency toward higher decibel levels...these are signs. Often this is best dealt with by using the 'ol standby of many a man and incorporation of silent agreement will be all that is required or recommended. If this tactic proves an aggravating action and she begins the "You're ignoring me" phase it is important to temporarily remove yourself from the situation, this can be bathroom use, pasta boiling, burning houses....etc...the key is to get away before she gets to phase 3. Phase 3 involves the woman stating in one way or another that she cannot talk to or deal with you. In extreme situations this will lead to the "Buh Bye" defense from the man which should only be used as a last resort because it may very well be a last. It is recommended that a medium sized (big enough for serval days clothes) be stationed on a closet shelf for quick access in emergency to make a solid point and some special item (phone, picture...etc...) should be tossed in at the last minute for effect. This tactic is reserved for those men who are very secure in the feelings of their mate as it can easily backfire.
Men are emotionally stupid (compared to women). Women have a greater innate insight into human emotional drive. They are more in touch with their instincts, which means its easier for them to understand the more subjective dynamics of human nature. Women are crazy when they expect men to operate similarly on that emotional, subjective level. We men are, of course, emotional beings as well, but 'stunted' in comparison to women, relying more heavily on the objective. The perfect example- women more easily attract a man based on the objective: how physically healthy they appear. Men more easily attract a woman based on the subjective: how interesting they seem.
Speak for yourself. Some of us have evolved. Fundamentally, Men and women are driven by clues of reproductive viability. But we men can spread our seed and move on. Women need security and support while bearing children. I will admit that my ex was far move devious than I ever imagined. Perhaps trust is a sign of being emotionally stunted.
There are certainly exceptions: women driven primarily by logic and the objective, men driven primarily by emotion and the subjective. But they are exceptions to the rule.
