What did the traffic light say to the car? Don’t look! I’m about to change. I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do *not* read it! What did one hat say to the other? You stay here. I’ll go on ahead. Why wouldn’t the shrimp share his treasure? Because he was a little shellfish. Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "Did you hear about that outbreak of mad cow disease? It makes cows go completely insane!". The other cow replies "Good thing I'm a helicopter". What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells. What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato whilst on a family walk? Ketchup. Why is there a fence around a cemetery? People are dying to get in.
Why do Athenians hate to get up early? Dawn is tough on Greece Of all the inventions of the last fifty years the dry erase board is the most remarkable...
Just saw an ad for a radio for sale. Ad stated "1 Dollar, volume stuck on full" I thought to myself "I just can't turn that down"
2.I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day. 3.I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised. 4.My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away. 5.I'm so good at sleeping. I can do it with my eyes closed. 6.My boss told me to have a good day.. so I went home. 7.Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands. Just remember - you're never really completely useless. You can always serve as a bad example.
