Somewhere in Iraq in the middle of a fierce firefight.
PFC Cantonian: A terrorist is trying to kill me. He's shooting at me.
Lt. Lackluster: Which one?
PFC Cantonian: That one over there.
Lt. Lackluster: There are many of them over there. Which one?
PFC Cantonian: The one wearing the keffiyah and a white shirt.
Lt. Lackluster: All of them are wearing keffiyahs.
PFC Cantonian: But, sir, they are terrorists. Shouldn't we catch them and send them to jail.
Lt. Lackluster: <shouting> WILL THE SAMMI THAT IS SHOOTING AT PFC CANTONIAN PLEASE RAISE YOUR HAND AND IDENTIFY YOUSELF.
Islamist: <shouting> No. I'm not telling you my name.
Lt Lackluster: <shouting> You are shooting at the US Army. That makes you a terrorist. We have to take you to jail. Now give us your name and stop being a coward.
Islamist: <shouting> Your shot at us first. You came here and shot at us.
Lt. Lackluster: <shouting> Now look, Sammi, we came here and shot at you first because we were told to. You can't just go shooting back. We are the US Army. That makes you a terrorist. Now please identify yourself Sammi, name and address.
Islamist: <shouting> (*)(*)(*)(*) you, American pig dog.
Lt. Lackluster: <angered and shouting> Now see here, Mr. Potty Mouth! We have women soldiers over here and we do not use that kind of language in the US Army. It's offensive and could be considered sexual harassment. So just watch your tongue.
PFC Cantonian: He's still shooting at me, sir.
Lt. Lackluster: Will you please shut up, Cantonian?
PFC: Cantonian: These terrorists are cowards sir.
Lt. Lackluster: <shouting> Will the Sammi who is shooting at PFC Cantonian please act like a man instead of a coward and please raise your hand so that we can identify which Sammi you are.
Islamist: <shouting> Eat (*)(*)(*)(*) and die America Bush dick sucker.
Lt. Lackluster <screaming> Gosh darn it. I am losing my patience with you. I will not allow you to curse like that in front of my female soldiers. I'm mad as heck. I demand that you stop the obscenity and identify yourself.
Islamist <shouting> I am the man whose house you destroyed. Whose shop you blew up. You (*)(*)(*)(*)ing idiot.
Lt. Lackluster: <shouting> Yes, well that gives you no right to scream obscenities and shoot at PFC Cantonian. I'm not going to ask you again to tell me your name. And watch your potty language. There's no need for that.
Islamist: <shouting> Oh, all right. It's Hussein Al-Hussein.
Lt. Lackluster: Write that down Cantonian. The guys name is Al Hussein.
PFC Cantonian: Sir, I think he said Hussein Al-Hussein. That's like "Bill Smith".
Lt. Lackluster: Mr. Hussein. Can I call you Al? Thank you and please wait for us after the firefight is over so that we can take you to prison.
Islamist: "(*)(*)(*)(*) your mother with my donkey's dick."
Last edited by Sparky Farkas; 06-13-2008 at 03:14 PM.
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