I have a scientific mind. So yes I would. But does he? That is a question only he can answer. Ask him. Odds are he will tell you that he is just there to hold your hand and let you know everything is going to be OK.

[quote]Not only that, don't you think it's just rude?[/qutoe]

Define rude. That is on the person. Some men would say yes, some would say no. Knowing most men, I would say no it is not rude.

Darling, the midwife, or berther always acts shocked. It happens. It is what they do. If they have been in the game long enough, there is nothing that they have not seen.

He is going to come even if he is not interested, because he loves you. You asked him to go right. Yeah you did or he would not be there. Even if you said. "Honey, do you want to go to this?" He took it as go or no more food beer or sex. It is how things are.

I hate to be mean or rude, but would you rather him sleep? Because I am sure he would rather be sleeping.

He is there supporting you by being there. Be thankful for that. Many men would have simply said no. He is showing his love simply by taking time out of his day by being there learning about something he will not even be a part of.

There are no everyday average guys. We are all individuals, just as you women are. We all do our own things for our own reasons. He is there, be thankful. If he said no, then you would have a reason to be mad.

Guys know their surroundings. They all knew their wives were watching them while they were watching him.

So!

As I said. I am interested in science. This is a science. I love to learn, some men don't. I pay attention when I think I may learn something. Some men don't. It does not mean he does not care about you, or your child. It just means that he may MAY feel useless at this point. Because up until the kid is born, most of us feel useless.

Well except the going out to get ice cream in the middle of the night.

If you want him involved, get him involved. Let him know that his role is important. But do not force him, or he may shy.

Regardless of what you read in Cosmo, we men are complex animals.

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Jones:- We're going to teach them climbing, abseiling, canoeing, archery, shooting...

Interviewer:- Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible isn't it?

Jones:- I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the range.

Interviewer:- Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?
You're equipping them to become violent killers.

Jones:- Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute but you're not one are you?

You're not helping!

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Jones:- We're going to teach them climbing, abseiling, canoeing, archery, shooting...

Interviewer:- Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible isn't it?

Jones:- I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the range.

Interviewer:- Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?
You're equipping them to become violent killers.

Jones:- Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute but you're not one are you?

We all got asked our first lesson. It's the first for all of us.

We hadn't even got to breastfeeding. He was reading through the labour part. The Chesboy doesn't have to come to the breastfeeding stuff - I don't care. But if he did come, you can be sure he'd have better manners.

It is rude. If you turn up to a class someone is running, and then blatantly show them that a book is more interesting than what they have to say, that's rude.

Rubbish.

And these men are interested - they ask more questions than the women, for the most part. Except Gary. He's been a dick from the start.

Well actually I was in a kind of tongue-in-cheek mood when I started the thread - but I'm pretty amazed that there are people here who think this is perfectly ok.

I mean, it's two hours out of the guy's life, for goodness sake. How hard is it to pay attention?

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We've got rules and maps and guns in our backs, but we still can't just behave ourselves. Even if to save our own lives, we are a brutal kind. The Shins

Then he's an idiot, but aren't they all? The night our second was born, I went to Lee and told him to get ready. I swear he said, "Can't you wait? I have the nuke test Wednesday!"

Men. Sheesh. You can't live with 'em. You can't rip their balls off and shove them down their throats. (Well, I could have if I wasn't having a contraction at the time).

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Order without liberty and liberty without order are equally destructive. - Theodore Roosevelt

Eewww. I don't read Cosmo! Puhlease.

I don't know about the men you know but I don't know any men who would consider this being forced upon them, or who would consider not showing up. I didn't have to ask the Chesboy. He was the one who organised the classes. He is intimately involved with everything - interested, supportive - and not just for me, for him. This is his child. He loves her, he wants to do everything he can. He can't help himself.

He didn't come last night because he is sick, and it was me who told him not to come. He would have - he loves it. I haven't had to ask him to do anything. He is an adult, and recognises his role in this experience.

Now, I know there are no everyday average guys - that was your term, not mine!

But that guff about `showing his love by coming' is just ridiculous. It's his baby, too. He was half responsible for conceiving the child, and he will be half responsible for raising it. Therefore he also has a responsibility to be a part of the pregnancy experience. That's not just up to the woman. And the guy isn't some superhero if he's involved. He's just doing what he should be doing.

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We've got rules and maps and guns in our backs, but we still can't just behave ourselves. Even if to save our own lives, we are a brutal kind. The Shins

You’re gonna love this then. Do you know how my mother went into labour with my eldest brother? They were at the drive in and the car wouldn’t start. My dad got her to get out and push!

10 hours later – voila! A bouncing baby boy. Lol.

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We've got rules and maps and guns in our backs, but we still can't just behave ourselves. Even if to save our own lives, we are a brutal kind. The Shins

LOL! They do get better each time though. The first time I went into labor, Lee made a huge pot of coffee and wrapped up a couple of sandwiches so he could keep his strength up in case took a while. Then he (who never went less than 5 miles over the speed limit) practically crawled the car to the hospital (he had to prove that he wasn't the least bit nervous).

The third time (twins), he actually didn't do anything stupid.

Have you ever seen the Dick Van Dyke Show? The one where little Richie was born is one of the best sitcom episodes ever.

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Order without liberty and liberty without order are equally destructive. - Theodore Roosevelt

See this bothers me. Why should a man even go to those things? If you are learning how to give birth and how to breast-feed why should the man be their. Do you want him back-seat driving, telling you you are doing it wrong? "Well look honey, the midwife told us to do it this way, and you are doing it worng!" Somehow I don't think the women would be happy.

So in the end it is about "moral support" which is nonsense. It does not exist. When you have a small creature forcing itself out of your vagina, you will need 2 things. First you will need an epidural, and second you will need some one to scream at. That is where the man will come in!!

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R.I.P. Molly, I miss you every day!!



Im a Tarte, what! you want some of this?



"Attempting to debate with a person who has abandoned reason is like giving medicine to the dead." -Thomas Paine

Lol! My dad felt kind of the same way - he wasn't there when we were born. But in those days, the men kind of weren't. It was a girl thang.

The father should get educated because labour is a long, drawn-out process that is very traumatic and painful and difficult for the woman - and can also be quite dangerous. There's really more to it than you realise - much more. The more you know, the better equipped you are to be that support person. Plus, it's your child. You have a responsibility to your child to be as informed as possible. Plus, you are BOTH parents. Why should the woman shoulder all the responsibility for the labour, birth and pregnancy? Sure, she's physically going through it, but you're in it together.

Men in Australia really must be different to men in America. Like I said, all the guys I know get really excited and interested about this stuff. After all, it's their baby too.

And for anyone to suggest that they're only interested because their women tell them to be, is just typecasting and is pretty darn sexist, too.

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We've got rules and maps and guns in our backs, but we still can't just behave ourselves. Even if to save our own lives, we are a brutal kind. The Shins

Actually you know what else is spinning me out about all this? It appears that going through the pregnancy, labour, preterm education and everything else is apparently solely the woman's responsibility, and if she's lucky the father of her child might reluctantly show up to be supportive - if he has to - however if that same woman decides she might want an abortion all of a sudden she shouldn't have any control over the situation at all, and the men have a LOT to say about it, and it's got nothing to do with her or what she wants.

Interesting....

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We've got rules and maps and guns in our backs, but we still can't just behave ourselves. Even if to save our own lives, we are a brutal kind. The Shins