Impeachment charges against Obama have been drawn up...they are-
1. He shot the Sheriff...and he shot the Deputy too.
2. He blew up the Space Shuttle Challenger (Michelle sabotaged the Columbia).
3. He never drinks....wine.
4. He is so mean, he once shot a man just for snoring.
5. He killed Frank Poole, and wouldn't open the pod bay doors for Dave Bowman.
6. He likes cats.
7. He puts ketchup on hot dogs.
8. A census taker once tried to test him, Obama ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Kee-anti!
9. He and his three droogs, like to sit in the Korova Milkbar making up their rassoodocks what to do with the evening.
10. He shot Vince Foster.
11. He drinks Foster's (not a good, honest American beer, dammit!)
12. He got Jar Jar Binks to give him emergency powers in the Galactic Senate.
13. He bombed Pearl Harbor.
14. He killed Moe Green, Tatagglia, Barzini, the heads of all the Five Families.
15. He smells like soup.
16. He once yelled at a blind man! (Okay, okay, he yelled "Look out there, friend"...but who cares. He still yelled at him!)
17. He took the $8000 Uncle Billy forgot and sent the bank examiners after George Bailey.
18. His ears are funny.
19. His name sounds funny.
20. He's going to leave you, as you left him...as you left her. Trapped for all eternity on a dead world...buried alive...buried alive!!!
21. His soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of rubbish imaginable mangled up.... in tangled up knottttttts!
22. He once shot a man in Reno...just to watch him die.
23. He'd steal a dead fly from a blind spider.
24. He cut off Gwyneth Paltrow's head and delievered it to Brad Pitt in the desert by UPS.
25. He applied for a job as a prison warden so he could put tacks in the electric chair.
26. He keeps trying to get Henry Blake replaced as commander of the 4077th, so he and Margaret can take over.
27. He takes sparrows, dips them in peroxide, and sells them as canaries.
28. He keeps preventing the re-opening of Camp Crystal Lake.
29. He campaigned for a dry county, got it passed, and then moved away.
30. He tempts Edmund with Turkish delight candies.
31. He killed Bambi's mother.
32. He sank the S.S. Minnow.
33. He tried to kill the Baudelaire orphans.
34. He tried to arrest Victor and Ilsa at the Casablanca airport.
35. He a very bad man, Jerry Seinfeld, a VERY bad man!
36. Obama told Janet Leigh in the hotel lobby that a boy's best friend is his mother.
37. (we learn Obama speaks Latin) Seems our Barack is an educated man....now I KNOW I hate him!
38. He became Margo Channing's understudy.
39. He ordered the gorillas to blow up Cornelius' cave excavation.
40. He tortured Morpheus to get the codes for the mainframe of Zion.
41. He gave Snow White a poisoned apple.
42. He boiled Michael Douglas' rabbit alive.
43. Obama's a 20 footer.....25...three tons of him!
44. He attacked Scarlett in the shantytown outside Atlanta.
45. He used ED-209 to try to kill Robo-cop.
#46. Obama keeps telling Luke to dig his dirt out of Boss Rahm's hole.
#47. Obama plans on marrying Mary Contrary and leading the Bogeymen against Toyland!
#48. Obama and Marv plan on breaking into Kevin's house on Christmas night.
#49. He's going to burn down Home-Tree to get the unobtanium for Selfridge and RDA.
#50. Obama plans on killing Sheriff Bart and snatching the land around Rock Ridge. (Truly ironic)
"I believe in the idea of amnesty for those who have put down roots and lived here, even though sometime back they may have entered illegally"---Ronald Reagan, 1984 Debate with Walter Mondale