My daughter's religious curiosity - Page 2

raytri · #11 (**permalink**) 04-06-2008, 07:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BillyBob

That seems like a pretty good reason TO go.

As I said, if there weren't another option, I'd do it. But part of religious education is teaching your children to live your convictions. I don't believe in what the church teaches, so I don't attend.

Quote:

Why would you allow people to infuse ideals into your daughter without being there yourself to monitor them?

I don't have to attend myself to discuss it with my daughter afterwards. And these are very good friends. They will be respectful.

Besides, I trust my daughter to think for herself.

Quote:

How will you be able to discuss with your daughter these things she is learning if you have no knowledge of them yourself?

I grew up in the church. I'm confident I will have knowledge of anything she is exposed to.

Quote:

You will certainly learn many things and meet many new people along with supporting your daughter.

Oh, certainly. But that's not really a reason to attend church. It's not a community I'm planning on joining, after all. I'm just not interested in sitting through a service for a faith I am familiar with but no longer follow.

Perhaps contradictorily, if she wanted to attend a synagogue or a mosque or a Buddhist ceremony, I'd take her myself. Because that would be something neither of us have experienced. But I would clearly be a tourist.

Quote:

She will certainly appreciate it.

If she really wanted me to go, I would.

Link S. · #12 (**permalink**) 04-06-2008, 05:23 PM

Here is my view on the matter and remember I am Mormon and I am a devout follower of my religion.

Everyone must accept their religion in their own time and it can't be forced on them. To force anything on anyone will only indoctrinate them against what they are being forced to accept. I see so many youth in my church that rebel just out of the fact that they are being forced into something they should have been allowed to accept within themselves.

The story of Noah is quite interesting when you delve into archaeology and find that an immense flood once covered the earth just by the composition of the rock in certain layers of sediment. As for the animals on the Ark that is more plausible when it is found that most animals around that time were alot smaller than the animals now and days for instance it is believed that the Giraffes neck was about five to seven feet shorter then than it is now.

My view is that eternity is a long time to have been mistaken in life and whether you believe in God or not imagine what would happen to you "IF"...
Anyway I am glad to hear that the child can accept her own religion within her own time.

Sickntiredofliblies · #13 (**permalink**) 04-08-2008, 10:18 PM

Interesting.

raytri, does she ask you whether you believe in god or not?
We don't have kids yet but my wife and I are both atheists, but raised catholic. So of course our families would try to indoctrinate them in some form. My wife and I have talked about this and well....we haven't decided whether or not we would tell the child that we don't believe in god . Children are influenced by their parents' opinions right? Most Catholics would baptise the child right away but we do have problems with forcing our (non-)religious beliefs on our children.

Tedminator · #14 (**permalink**) 04-08-2008, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by raytri

I'm an agnostic and my wife can best be described as a deist, so we don't belong to any particular religion or go to church.

However, I was raised Presbyterian, and we talk to our kids about religion (covering the major tenets of all the major belief systems) so that they're not raised ignorant of the concept.

My 8-year-old loves stories of any kind, and lately has been asking me to tell her Bible stories. So I've been telling her some common Jesus stories -- the loaves and the fishes, the walking on water, etc.

Finally I asked her if she wanted to read them for herself. My Southern Baptist mother-in-law had given us a "Jesus loves me" kids Bible years ago, which we stashed on our bookshelf. I took it down and handed it to my daughter.

She disappeared into her bedroom, emerging hours later having read the whole thing. Now she's re-reading it catch all the details she missed on her first time through.

We've been asking her what she thought, and her response has been "some of it seems true, some made-up." She didn't find Noah's Ark all that believable, or most of the miracles. But she thought most of the rest of what Jesus did was plausible.

I frankly doubt she's going to experience a sudden religious conversion, but if she does that's her business. We have friends who go to church, and they'd be happy to take her along if she wanted to go.

Just thought y'all might be interested in how a family of unbelievers handles religion.

hah lucky kids.

--

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sickntiredofliblies

Interesting.
raytri, does she ask you whether you believe in god or not?
We don't have kids yet but my wife and I are both atheists, but raised catholic. So of course our families would try to indoctrinate them in some form. My wife and I have talked about this and well....we haven't decided whether or not we would tell the child that we don't believe in god . Children are influenced by their parents' opinions right? Most Catholics would baptise the child right away but we do have problems with forcing our (non-)religious beliefs on our children.

I got snipped and dunked before I knew what hit me

Personally, was born & raised a Roman Catholic, So I still am.
But not at all devout.. my connection to The Church is mostly for the historical ties at this point.

If I have kids, more than likely I'll take them to a mass. A real one with the works.. at a Cathedral, in latin, the whole smokey pomp and ceremony with choir music that can bring grown men to their knees in tears... Helluva show!

hmm the Vatican should really sell tickets to it.

JMS · #15 (**permalink**) 04-08-2008, 11:01 PM

i have a friend whose parents are atheists, and as a child, when he asked what happens when you die, his parents told him, nothing, you just die. he told me he started crying when he heard this, so his parents decided to tell him they were just kidding and that people go to heaven when hey die. hes an atheist now.

some kids dont take the realization of their mortality lightly. i know this post doesnt seem very relevant, but when i read the original post i thought of this.

Sickntiredofliblies · #16 (**permalink**) 04-08-2008, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tedminator

If I have kids, more than likely I'll take them to a mass. A real one with the works.. at a Cathedral, in latin, the whole smokey pomp and ceremony with choir music that can bring grown men to their knees in tears... Helluva show!

hmm the Vatican should really sell tickets to it.

Wow, they still do it latin where you are?? I've never been to a latin mass.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JMS

i have a friend whose parents are atheists, and as a child, when he asked what happens when you die, his parents told him, nothing, you just die. he told me he started crying when he heard this, so his parents decided to tell him they were just kidding and that people go to heaven when hey die. hes an atheist now.

some kids dont take the realization of their mortality lightly. i know this post doesnt seem very relevant, but when i read the original post i thought of this.

That is relevant. Children have a harder time understanding the concept of mortality or even morality without some sort of tangible consequences being involved. We've even talked about the usefulness of religion with kids. Kids are deterred from acting out due to some form of threats ie: santa's watching you or god's watching you.

JMS · #17 (**permalink**) 04-08-2008, 11:27 PM

yeah, i know what you mean (probably why i thought of it), but raytri didnt seem to have any issues with the subject of death. thats why i say its kinda off. i agree with your post.

raytri · #18 (**permalink**) 04-09-2008, 08:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sickntiredofliblies

Interesting.

raytri, does she ask you whether you believe in god or not?

It came up years ago; I don't remember exactly how.

We explained that Mom believes in a god, Dad isn't sure. We noted that there are many different religions, and plenty of good people believe in all of them -- or none of them.

We've never sugarcoated it or anything. Just been frank, direct and respectful.

Quote:

We don't have kids yet but my wife and I are both atheists, but raised catholic. So of course our families would try to indoctrinate them in some form. My wife and I have talked about this and well....we haven't decided whether or not we would tell the child that we don't believe in god . Children are influenced by their parents' opinions right? Most Catholics would baptise the child right away but we do have problems with forcing our (non-)religious beliefs on our children.

We made it clear from the beginning that it's up to our kids to decide what they believe. That's why, while we tell them what we think, we're very careful not to put down religion or believers. When they get older, we'll discuss all the good/bad done in the name of religion, as well as all the good/bad done without religion.

Our purpose is to raise an independent thinker, not someone who believes what we believe.

That said, we're also adamant that our children's spiritual development is our business, not our relatives. My wife's parents kept trying to sneak religion into our kids' lives when they were young. We asked politely for them to stop, but finally we had to confront them and tell them to knock it off if they ever wanted to be invited back to our house or allowed to babysit (we'd come home and find them watching religious broadcasting with the kids... that sort of thing).

It wasn't because we opposed religion -- it was totally a matter of protecting parental prerogative.

catzmeow · #19 (**permalink**) 04-09-2008, 09:49 AM

My kids and I have had a lot of discussions about religion. We all used to go to church together when I was married, my ex was devoutly religious. I went to support him, but didn't believe. Now that we aren't married, of course, I don't go. If the kids have questions, I answer them. I do not attend church, my son occasionally goes with my ex, my daughter has no interest.

I realized a few years ago, though, that the story of Noah's Ark is really kind of horrifying, when you think about it....It's definitely not a cute cuddly bedtime story.

Herkdriver · #20 (**permalink**) 04-09-2008, 09:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by raytri

I'm an agnostic and my wife can best be described as a deist, so we don't belong to any particular religion or go to church.

However, I was raised Presbyterian, and we talk to our kids about religion (covering the major tenets of all the major belief systems) so that they're not raised ignorant of the concept.

My 8-year-old loves stories of any kind, and lately has been asking me to tell her Bible stories. So I've been telling her some common Jesus stories -- the loaves and the fishes, the walking on water, etc.

Finally I asked her if she wanted to read them for herself. My Southern Baptist mother-in-law had given us a "Jesus loves me" kids Bible years ago, which we stashed on our bookshelf. I took it down and handed it to my daughter.

She disappeared into her bedroom, emerging hours later having read the whole thing. Now she's re-reading it catch all the details she missed on her first time through.

We've been asking her what she thought, and her response has been "some of it seems true, some made-up." She didn't find Noah's Ark all that believable, or most of the miracles. But she thought most of the rest of what Jesus did was plausible.

I frankly doubt she's going to experience a sudden religious conversion, but if she does that's her business. We have friends who go to church, and they'd be happy to take her along if she wanted to go.

Just thought y'all might be interested in how a family of unbelievers handles religion.

If you do not believe in something, you will fall for anything.

Your daughter will face an onslaught of negativity and temptation as she grows older.

A foundation of religious morals can be the harbor's beacon of light in a sea of despair.

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