Barack Obama Starts Own Church

DanteAugustusGermanicus · #1 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 12:50 PM

Quote:

Barack Obama Starts Own Church
June 4, 2008 ·

By Xavier Muhammad

Obama will find spiritual comfort in his house of worship.

(CHICAGO) After weeks of searching in vain for a new spiritual home, Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama has decided to start his own church.

The Most Reverential House of Yes We Can A.M.E Zion will hold its first service this Sunday in a building the Obama 2008 Presidential Campaign recently purchased on West 95th Street in Chicago.

“It makes a lot of sense,” Obama supporter Oprah Winfrey told The Peoples News in an exclusive interview. “After what Barack has done this year, a lot of people think he is bigger than Jesus. Some even think he’s bigger than me.”

The unorthodox move occurred after numerous spiritual leaders refused to let Obama join their churches. Given the public condemnations that his previous spiritual advisors Rev. Jeremiah Wright and Father Michael Fleger received, none of the other pastors wanted to risk the increased scrutiny his presence would bring.

“Not all my sermons were about giving God the glory,” said the Rev. Leroy Wilson of The Church of What’s Happening Now. “Sometimes they were about giving Whitey hell.”

In fact, just about every pastor who leads a predominantly African-American congregation has “said something crazy in their day,” said Cornell West, professor of religion at Princeton University.

“But most intelligent people understand that what the pastor says from the pulpit doesn’t necessarily reflect the mindset of every single person hearing those words,” West said. “Everyone except people who work for certain other campaigns, I guess.”

Many people, especially blacks, look at Obama as a miracle worker. Essie Smith, 81, a grandmother who lives on Chicago’s west side, has already put the candidate’s photo in her living room beside Martin Luther King Jr., Jesus and John F. Kennedy.

“He’s a black man who beat a white woman and didn’t even have to go to jail,” Smith said. “If he can do that, he can do anything.”

Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News. It’s not real, but we hope it made you think.

© 2008 The Peoples News
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White Fox · #2 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanteAugustusGermanicus

can this be true?

No it cannot. It says so at the bottom of the article.

-

DanteAugustusGermanicus · #3 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by White Fox

No it cannot. It says so at the bottom of the article.

-

the bottom?

but what about what Oprah is alleged to have said?

Quote:

“It makes a lot of sense,” Obama supporter Oprah Winfrey told The Peoples News in an exclusive interview. “After what Barack has done this year, a lot of people think he is bigger than Jesus. Some even think he’s bigger than me.”

...it sure sounds like her.

White Fox · #4 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanteAugustusGermanicus

the bottom?

but what about what Oprah is alleged to have said?

...it sure sounds like her.

Yes, the bottom

Quote:

Note: This article is satire, brought to you by the creative minds at The Peoples News. It’s not real, but we hope it made you think.

manifold · #5 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 01:03 PM

Hey DAG,

Are you waiting for Hillary's permission before you jump on the Obama bandwagon? I hear it'll be coming tomorrow.

DanteAugustusGermanicus · #6 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by manifold

Hey DAG,

Are you waiting for Hillary's permission before you jump on the Obama bandwagon? I hear it'll be coming tomorrow.

I have no problem with Obama. I just don't think he is a good choice for President at this time---plus...I am so scared of all the haters that surround him. And those are only the white upper middle class progressives and independents.

Obama's campaign was as flawed as Clinton's. Add the media and perceptions formed and fed by them and add the hands- off-Obama attitude so far and we get a weak candidate beating a very strong one.

It happens.

DanteAugustusGermanicus · #7 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by White Fox

Yes, the bottom

wow! you're right. don't know how I missed that one. and here I was applying for membership.

oy vey!

BillyBob · #8 (**permalink**) 06-06-2008, 01:35 PM

Obama worships at the alter of anti-American globalism.

manifold · #9 (**permalink**) 06-07-2008, 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanteAugustusGermanicus

I have no problem with Obama. I just don't think he is a good choice for President at this time---plus...I am so scared of all the haters that surround him. And those are only the white upper middle class progressives and independents.

Obama's campaign was as flawed as Clinton's. Add the media and perceptions formed and fed by them and add the hands- off-Obama attitude so far and we get a weak candidate beating a very strong one.

It happens.

But you still think he's a better choice than McCain...right?

DanteAugustusGermanicus · #10 (**permalink**) 06-07-2008, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by manifold

But you still think he's a better choice than McCain...right?

Nope. I think McCain may be the better choice. But what is a good choice by the standards I have may not be what is best for what I want to see happen. The one candidate that I think is most qualified and who is a great leader has opinions at odds with my core beliefs. So what do I do? Do I vote for a leader? Do I vote for a manager and trust the inexperienced one will grow into the job?

I can and have voted for people I disagree with. I have voted party line. I have voted interests and conscience and sometimes...issues, but this year is different in so many ways, I feel like both a spinning top and a yoyo.

yo yo maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, I'm gettin' dizzy.

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