Call me a quack, but i think there is a way to make people feel better if they were to use what they have around them with easy access to it. i mean, every medicine we take is made out of something from somewhere, and, with a little patience and a lot of luck, maybe we can make house hold remedies that work every time? Let's observe the most common ailment of the regular household, stress. how do we relieve stress from work for mom and dad, and, kids at school? well, stress is where your muscles and brain are tired, and will retract or shrink into a little less mass to help them relax, like a elastic band - when it is stretched, it is from work; it wants to get back to normal and relax even more. So, the best way to relax after a hard day is to start with the brain, as, it is the center of the nervous system where all instructions come from. this means that it needs to have the blood thinned - drinking alcohol will help, yes? drinking water will help, giving blood will help - anything where you thin your blood will alleviate stress on the brain. Now, for the muscles. these are tired because of my elastic band approach, in practice. basically, you need to massage them, loosen them up with more energy. using one of those jiggly weight loss shaking machines will also help relieve stress. tapping yourself gently will relax muscles. if you were to rub yourself with deep heat, it will relax muscles. if you were to have a warm shower, or, dress warmly, then the heat, being energy trapped on your body, will relax muscles. i think static will relax muscles too, so rubbing yourself vigorously will also help, like a massage. I am hoping to get into more technical remedies, but hope you all agree so far - well do you have anything to add?
Quakery for the regular city household. Thought for a minute that this would be instructions for Quakers.
I find in the third world, like my country south africa, lots of people have rotten teeth. i have found a way previously to revive them so that they won't smell and won't hurt when you use them, and, will look whiter again. it is all simple! you could use things around the house to do this, as with all my remedies, well, nearly all of them... So, you have some rotten teeth. what to do? if you were to observe that teeth are like bones, you will see that they will heal like bones. what heals bones? bones are made of cells, like all living things, and, you can heal cells by 'feeding' them. basically, eating correctly will see them slowly revive themselves, but, we want to do it quickly, don't you? yes you do! great success... Now, if you were to observe that all medicine comes from natural things, or, combinations of natural things, then we will find that bones grow strong from milk, yes? think of babies growing - they have milk teeth to help squeeze the milk out of the boobies and it is sore, but it works for them, getting the extra ten percent or whatever. so, milk, ah, calcium helps, yes? So, if you were to take some powdered milk and rub it onto your teeth with your fingers, you will see the teeth get stronger on the outside. i am afraid i cannot get right to the center of the teeth, but they will have an mushroom effect where they will heal the centre of the teeth slowly, but, the things i said would be there will be there. What did you guys think of that one?
I have previously found a way to sculpt people's faces with liquid nitrogen applied in tiny small amounts to kill off cells, and then you inject something genetic to inflate other areas, sculpting the face or any other living thing, but, that is hard to get hold of. so... If we were to use some 'herbs' that are like sand bio-sandpaper, we could rub off the flesh, but that would be terribly sore and your cells would fall out. ouch. if we were to heat the fat cells, they will turn back into thinner things and flow through the blood, and then you poop them out. if you were to use something like chili leaves, you could get some of that potent stuff into your body and see the fat 'fly off.' well, maybe not that fast, but it will work. To add mass you need to eat lots of glucose or straight off fat. you could also try to 'sweat' stuff in through your pores, of course. the things you want to rub on your body to increase mass is to use butter or condensed milk, i hope... What did you think of that one? scary wasn't it?
Well well well, here we are, with beautiful people, but, wouldn't it be nice to reduce and thicken bones and make people taller and shorter? well, let's get to it! If we were to want to reduce bone mass, you know, if you are big boned and stuff, you might want to observe what the opposite of calcium is... well, failing that, we could use radiation, yes? this radiation could be 'started' in the body on the outside of the bones, and whittle them down. making this a house hold remedy would be hard and slow in the end, but let's give it a try? If we were to observe that bones are made up of cells, we could maybe try to reduce the mass by rubbing our arms, legs, hips and so forth with some gel of some sort, maybe bleach? we could rub this on our bodies in the right areas, and, see the bleach get absorbed into our bodies. now, if bleach enters the blood stream, it will kill us, so, we need to also know if we get cut or something, it will. then, we need to know out blood vessels are closed cells and that it won't enter the blood stream, but, will penetrate to the bone, killing some of it off slowly. this will take a long time. To make our bones stronger or thicker, we need to rub on something that gather biomass. this could be teeth whitener or something else that gathers on bones - use your imagination! To make people taller we need to stretch the bones. to do this we need to make the bones thinner and 'elongated,' relaxing if you will. we can do this with some deep heat, rubbed all the way through to the bones, which, change slowly but nearly permanently. To make people shorter, we need to make the bones contract. this can be done by stressing them out, so, we could lift weights or something more practical - this is much faster. So, did i miss anything, i am not so sure of myself this time, otherwise i will be like
I have seen many people wanting a natural tan, and realized this could lead to something wonderful, if, the pigments were readily available, then people could make it like a 'coloring in' contest! First, to go from too white to quite tanned, or even very tanned, you need to observe the pigments and how the skin changes color. some skin it thick, and some is thin, but, they are all made out of the same stuff. to make the skin darker, you could lie in the sun or sun bed, slap on some tanning lotion, or get creative. now, to change from white to 'brown,' you could observe that skin is sensitive and will go red when it is hit if you are white. observing white skin and how it changes is the best way to figure out how skin changes colors, i find, as it is like a canvas, yes? So, to change to a tanned adonis, you need to observe that the darker skin is tougher - believe me. the darker someone's skin is, the harder it is, so, this could be like growing bone mass, yes? basically, you need to get your skin to 'contract' and then get tougher. to do this you need to compress the skin by applying some sort of gel or liquid that sucks stuff in - something salty? this will make the skin come together, at least for a while. applying it for a long time would lead to a darker skin for a long time. so, salt water would make you darker, i guess? Now, to make it darker permanently, you need to make it tighter. putting on weight will stretch your skin, so you would be lighter i think. if you were to be in a warm room, you will see your skin go lighter, as it will loosen. so, like in africa, where it is very hot, the pigment changes to be something darker. Making skin tight will increase the pigment a lot. let's take this to the kitchen! If we were to rub some fruit acids on our skin, they will tighten yes? this will make you darker, no need for the sun. just rub a lot on. to make sure it doesn't go back to the way it was, you need to solidify the effects. this can be done by heating the skin so it absorbs the liquids. Of course, to go lighter, you would probably use conditioner or shampoo. this will make the skin less tough and tight, and it will result in lighter skin. as well, heating it will make it permanent, but i don't know why anyone would do this, as black people don't usually want to be lighter - they would look ridiculous!
For stress, I suggest sexual release if you can either masturbation or with your partner of choice it is good for the heart and releases endorphins upon orgasm plus is cheap and fun to boot.
I think it is quite common to catch a cold or the flu every now and again, and it would be great if the common enemy could be cured by household remedies, yes? basically, if you were to catch a cold, the symptoms are feeling drained of energy and getting a lot of mucous. if you were to observe that if the symptoms are gone, the ailment is defunct, of course. Now, if you were to want to feel more energized then you need to eat stuff with sugar in it, or, not eat too much stuff with sugar in it, as, it will also make your mucous more of a problem. so, you should try to observe that the real problem is the mucous, as that is the cold's cell's dividing and infesting the body. So, to get rid of the mucous, you need to make it thinner so you can spit it out - don't be grossed out, it is the best way to rid yourself of this! if you were to drink lots of water, or, drink alcohol, it will thin your blood and then the mucous will get thinner and easier to spit out, as it will collect in your mouth. or, you could burn incense and smell it, fry some herbs and breathe them in - they will all thin your blood and then you might be able to get rid of it. i have also heard of eating chilli peppers to sweat the flu out of your body.
This keeps getting better and better, and it makes every bit as much sense as chiropractic and even more than homeopathy. Next I want to see home based liposuction, tummy tucks and face lifts done with power tools.
I have sometimes got headaches, and know that a lot of people get these. i wonder if there is a household cure for headaches when people are out of cheap products and pills? If we were to observe what happens when we have a headache, well, let's take a look at some referenced material? As you can see, there is no know cause for the headaches, but there are symptoms. i know that when you have sex, your headache gets worse, so, could it be hormonal? i mean, could it be a lack of sex? is it true that people that are not married will get more headaches? i am not sure, maybe someone can tell me? But, back to business! if you were to observe that headaches get worse with stressing your body out, then, i suppose that we could say that stress causes headaches? if you were to observe this, then the best cure for a headache, like stress, is to relax your muscles, as with the 'stress cure' i spoke about at the beginning of this thread. or, let's take a look at how headache tablets work? So, this is where our body communicates, and, they basically slow down or dull communication, yes? this is an educated guess, of course. Now, if the whole body needs to 'slow down,' i am sure we can improve on this. if we were to ingest something that goes to the brain, basically, this would be something that a neurotransmitter can pick up easily and will bypass the rest of the body, it will be combined with the relaxant, which we have not found yet. If we were to use something that requires 'electric charge' to 'dissolve,' and then we would need a metal of some sort, as that will conduct the 'thing' into the brain, so, maybe some meat or something? then, we need to lace the meat with some herbs, as that clears up the senses of the body quickly. So, now, we have our cure for a headache! it is, steak with herbs or other things that clear the sinuses. What did you think of that one? bet you thought i was going to choke?
So, we have covered the basics. now, we need to go up a little bit to something that still affects a lot of people, but less than those things we have covered. Chicken pox is a 'coarse' disease of the skin where the little bumps come up all over the children. if, we were to observe how to stop these 'things,' then we could start by ingesting something inside the body, instead of doing something sore outside of the body. Now, to get rid of the "pox" we need to take something in that sucks up mucous, as that is all there is to it, as, the pox are made of mucous you can see when you scratch them. this means, of course, that we need to eat or drink something that will suck up the mucous, something that dries the skin, but, wait a minute, doesn't the child's skin feel dry to the parent? well, this is because the skin is being shared with the rest of the pock. So, if we were to drink some salt, then we could see a rapid change as the mucous is sucked up from the inside. or, if that doesn't work, we could try to drink something that thins the blood, as, then the supply of oxygen and carbon to the pocks will be less. this will help a little bit. water should do it nicely. then, we could also drink some other things i mentioned, the ones that make your skin lighter, like, the one for the cleansing of the pores. this could be like showering in shampoo - a lot of it, and drying carefully. this cleans hair, why not clean some pores? drinking something that cleanses, like, for example, gin, before bed time so the kids can just fall asleep, will also clean the body and pores. To cure these things naturally and safely, we should drink salt water and gin and wash our hair a lot! yes! how is my stack now?
To cure cancer, we need to observe that the disease is caused from within the body, from natural cells becoming 'excited' and activating themselves. to kill these cells - i cannot remember what they do? - but they are native cells, so we can kill them by making our red or white blood 'health maintenance' cells attack them, as they do, as they become a disease to be fought. so, we need to get the cells to smother them. the problem is that they will 'merge' with the other cells, coming i think from cells that are 'frozen.' So, we need to kill off native cells behaving aggressively. this could be helped by observing that the other cells are more placid. this means, they will be warmer... if we could cool them down, then there would be hope, yes? if we could change their cellular structure, then we could see them off. making a medicine to combat them would be easy, but we need something everybody can afford. Now, to kill the cancer cells, we need to eat way too much of something. this will feed the other cells, but, will make them bigger as they expand to accommodate the fuels. then, the cells would expand and be immune to the disease, that eats cells rather than fuels. Aids is different, as, it is not native. we can cure aids by using cancer cells, and kill cancer with aids cells, ones that die quickly.
To cure this disease, we need to observe it is a lung infection, but, infection is such a big word. it is really a little bit of fluff in your lungs. if you were to ingest some moisture, maybe some ice cream or pudding, in quantities that are enough, then you will be cured in no time! Well, i am up late again, and need to log off eventually, but i had fun tonight, how about you?
This is where our d.n.a. has one too many chromosomes, or that the communication between transmitters is not working properly to their maximum output. i remember doing this with a lab, i wonder if i can do this in the kitchen? If we were to observe that, for the autism, we need to get that extra chromosome to stop functioning, we need to eat animals and meat. this would mean that their d.n.a. which was alive with a d.n.a. code, will get into our bodies and swamp out the faulty d.n.a. that will be replaced by it, lowering the chromosome count, yes? the best thing to eat would be mammals like beef and no poultry, as their d.n.a. is reptilian. Now, to get the communication in your brain working properly, you need to eat things with metals in them, as, metals are conductors and amplify the signals of our neurotransmitters. this would mean maybe rather trying to get hold of some carbon monoxide, as then , our bodies will recover eventually, but, the 'chemicals' will lace the brain and insides to ensure better cellular communication. water is also a conductor, so getting it to the brain or even other nerves will see them conduct better. To maximize the communication, which i think is only a little better now, we need to make them grow bigger and stronger! these cells need some fuels to do that, so, using steroids will do the job well, or, even viagra? Shew i am having fun now! what a night! reminds me of the old days... yeah...
