https://alexanderfang.wordpress.com...derance-of-the-evidence-patriarchy-and-trust/ Taken from my blog, there's a bit more where I've put in the ellipses.
Ill be honest and say i didn't 100% understand your first post but i can say from personal experience handing over control to someone else is very liberating. Lose control, gain freedom. I know it sounds ridiculous but when you think about it, being in control carries a lot of responsibility and accountability. Sometimes its nice to just say " you take over". This is why many people enjoy a dom/sub relationship (not christian grey style. Fsog is NOT a consensual dom/sub relationship and the book has been shunned by the bdsm community). My relationship with my husband is probably 55(me) to 45 (him). We decided early in the relationship that since i had the mammory glands and uterus it made more sense for me to stay home with the children whilst he works. Since i am home i tend to know more about our financial position and have more opportunity to "arrange" our lives. But having the majority of control can be a burden. For example;when we built our home i made the final decision on the house plans. Now we live in a house neither of us likes, and that's my fault. on the odd occasion my husband has put his foot down and made the final decision, i have had the enjoyment of sitting back and letting all responsibility fall on him. However, all successful relationships are based on compromise.
Actually it sounds like as long as you stick to your role as a 1950s June Cleaver-type woman....your husband will "support" you.
I think that's just acknowledging that all marriages can never be 50/50. How do you break a tie? Sometimes it's 30/70 and sometimes, it's 0/100. It depends on the issue or the question. That's why marriages are a series of compromises.
I think as long as both parties are happy with their share of control, a marriage can work just fine. And its also perfectly fine to have frequent power shifts in your relationship. As you said, its all about compromise.
Wow, is that an absurd view, incredibly simplistic. Division of power (ie which one has the controlling vote) is simply a matter of who has the deciding factor in what aspects of the relationship. But I guess that is just too complex - or too convenient for you. You also are obviously fixated on gender, which makes no sense at all. In fact, often in marriages one or the other is the dominate one and often this the woman and in same sex relationships one is the dom and the other the sub. Maybe you never heard of such and have to keep everything super simplistic for you to function. Nor do you have any grasp of the concept of equal power requires negotiation - and you oppose every compromising or negotiating anything in a relationship. One is the master and the other the slave. If so, the man should be the slave for obvious reasons. Since only women can have children, if one MUST have the final say over everything, then it should be women. You should support that as a man, that way you can be in the superior position of "apparent weakness." I gather you also favor a totalitarian, monarchy system of government, right?
And right now it's hovering on 49/51... Men lose again! This article is displaying the quintessential male stupidity.
How do you measure responsibility, power or equality? Your whole blog sounds like an excuse a control freak would make for subjugating another person. I have heard men using similar reasoning when they are abusing (often with violence) a women "its for your own good" "if you do not except my control others will just use you". Do you really see a relationship in terms of a power struggle?
A ton of importance once you get into things like divorce laws and social stigma. If honor is what emerges when someone with power shows themselves to be worthy of trust, it's also something that requires unequal power relationships. Being that men and women are different it's only natural for men to have more power on the more obvious levels while the social structure favors women in more subtle ways. But that is itself only possible when a woman lacks the more obvious forms of power as I explained.
This is a good point, I might want to specify that the arrangement of power and responsibility tends to change as different issues come up. Although in some ways that's already implied. People who categorically disagree and want to bring things like "cis gender" or whatever into this kind of thing will never be pleased anyway...