CNN Reporter to trump: Why do you keep pushing the use of hydroxychloroquine if doctors are already testing it. Why announce that you can get it if is a medical decision? Why not leave that up to the doctors and patients? What do you hope to achieve? Trump: Did you know I had sex with your mother? But that aside, you are a pathetic excuse of a human being for asking something like that. Only CNN would ask something like that. No I have not secretly purchased all of the hydroxychloroquine in stock. Okay? Fake news. And no you can't have my tax returns.
New York City officials revealed today an emergency plan to bury the dead in city parks if need be. Five companies contacted the city claiming to have a great deal of experience in this area - Bonanno and Sons, Colombo and Sons, Gambino and Sons, Genovese and Sons, and Lucchese and Sons are all bidding on the job.
Trump was urging his minions to attend church on Sunday. It's safe! It's safe! He exclaimed. The crowd cheered and cheered! "He has saved us!!!" they proclaimed. When the cameras went dark, Hillary removed her trump mask and started laughing hysterically.
When informed that Philippine dictator Duterte's execution squads are killing Corona infected people on sight, or anyone suspected to be sick, trump was shocked. "He only has half the infection rate that I do" trump objected, "and I'm weeks away from having people executed".
There is a great deal on Corona hospitalizations from Groupon. Burials from Amazon are booming. And in a disturbing turn of events, McDonald's is spinning off a new company called McMorgues. Their motto is "To Serve Man"
If survival during this pandemic is a function of Darwinism, then PF is going to be a lonely place soon.
Medical experts are shocked by the level of cooperation shown by Americans. In first-world States all over the nation, people are hunkering down and staying home. No one imagined that if you give people a month's long vacation or the opportunity to work from home, they would take it.
On a sad note, Mary Kay representatives have been hard hit. Today there was a long line of pink coffins seen at a Texas hospital. And of course, Mary Kay products were used on the deceased.
"Poor Whinney", said one Mary Kay representative as she mourned the loss of her associate. "But I must say, with my Mary Kay Skin Renewal Kit, and this amazing Triple Action Lift and Luminate serum, she looks better dead than when she was alive!" she declared.