Tasteless Humor II The Second One.

One thing Trump can take full credit for. In the last two years there's been renewed interest in his favorite book the Bible. Some looking for the story of the two Corinthians only to be sadly disappointed but mostly they're reading Revelations.

 

I watched every episode of that show. Thanks for the memories.

Now let's go get our Willie Wonka'd.

 

It wasn't taken off the air but it did generate a lot of controversy and some groups tried to ban it.

Best bit is the Phil Collins bit total class

 

What is 10 metres long and has 37 teeth?
A bus full of bogans.

 

CNR.

Two brothers enlisting in the Army were getting their physicals. During the inspection, the doctor was surprised to discover that both of them possessed incredibly long, oversized penises. "How do you account for this?" he asked the brothers. "It's hereditary, sir," the older one replied. "I see," said the doctor, writing in his file. "Your father's the reason for your elongated penises?" "No sir, our mother." "Your mother? You idiot, women don't have penises!" "I know, sir," replied the recruit, "But she only had one arm, and when it came to getting us out of the bathtub, she had to manage as best she could."

 

My mate David lost his ID.

Now he's just Dav

 

We call them Scottish.

 

Yes Democrats are reading their own version of revelations, although they call it the Green New Deal.

Trump supporters on the other hand are enjoying Trump's economy because their world isn't ending in 12 years.

 

A woman was in bed having sex with her husband's friend, when all of a sudden the telephone rings, she answers. After hanging up she says, ''That was Harry, but don't worry, he won't be home for a while. He's playing cards with you.''

 

A guy goes fishing every Saturday morning. He gets up early and eager, makes his lunch, hooks up his boat and off he goes, all day long. Well, one Saturday morning he gets up early, dresses quietly, gets his lunch made, puts on his long johns, grabs the dog and goes to the garage to hook up his boat to the truck and down the driveway he goes. As he is coming out of his garage rain is pouring down, it is like a torrential downpour. There is snow mixed in with the rain, and the wind is blowing 50 mph. Minutes later, he returns to the garage. He comes back into the house and turns the TV to the weather channel. He finds it's going to be bad weather all day long, so he puts his boat back in the garage, quietly undresses and slips back into bed. There he cuddles up to his wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispers, "The weather out there is terrible." To which she sleepily replies, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that ****?"

 

Is Rachel Maddow Tom Green in disguise?

Have they ever been seen in the same room together?

 

That sounds a little too Pee Wee Herman. "Oh yeah? Oh yeah? I know what you are but what about me?" Can you do better?

 

I can't be bothered today

Watch this instead

 

Freddie Starr found dead.
Hamster arrested.

 

That one is going to confuse anyone not from the UK.

 

The US has South Park, trust me, the denizens of Tasteless Humo(u)r got it.

 

So annoying, he died and I never got my compensation off him for eating my hamster.

 

StillBlue it was the 2nd best headline The Sun ever published

 

Is a laxative a **** idea as a lubricant for a bit of chocolate fudge tunnel love?

 

Les and his offsider, Scratch, made a nice thing out of taking tourists out fishing in their boat. One day Les told Scratch about a little problem.
"We've got this party booked for next Wednesday and they're all women. You know we've got no toilet on the boat. How the hell do we explain that to them?"
Scratch wasn't worried at all.
"There's nice ways of saying these things. Like you can use the expression 'evacuate yourself."
"Well Scratch, how'd it be if you told 'em?"
On the Wednesday morning Les and Scratch were briefing their female charges and Scratch announced:
"There's one other thing, ladies. We have no toilet aboard so if you want to evacuate yourselves, you'll have to piss over the side."

 

Observing The Baby One night a wife found her husband standing over their baby's crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, scepticism. Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, with eyes glistening she slipped her arm around her husband. "A penny for your thoughts," she said. "It's amazing!" he replied. "I just can't see how anybody can make a crib like that for only $67.50”.

 

The Duke of Edinburgh is said to be absolutely disgusted with Danny Baker.
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Apparently, he was going to post that picture.