Is child support fair or BS?

I have no kids. But I know folks of all races who do and have to pay support. Is it fair? Is it set up to take too much? Does it depend?

 

You want the State to pay to raise your offspring?

 

Part of it depends on whether it is your child or not.

 

It's only fair that the spouse gaining custody of the children receive compensation for their financial obligations. the amount depends.

 

I saw a story about a black guy that ordered a DNA test, found out the child wasn't his years later. The judge put him in prison for not continuing to pay child support for a child that was not his kid.

 

Was he married to the lady who had the baby?

 

No, here is a link http://6abc.com/news/man-may-be-jailed-for-not-paying-child-support-for-son-who-isnt-his/490355/

 

My ex-wife left me and the two kids. She came back a year later and said she wanted a divorce and custody of the kids (ages 6 and 3).

The courts awarded her the kids because she didn't have a criminal record and the default position is to award the kids to the mother. And although my ex-wife and I earn the exact same income, I was forced to pay 15 years of child support (until my youngest child graduated high school).

All fifteen years, my ex-wife used the child support money to:

• increase her 401K
• pay her mortgage
• remodel her kitchen and bath
• take several Caribbean cruises

So in addition to paying the child support, I also had to pay for the kids':

• food
• clothes
• medical and dental insurance
• soccer, football, and baseball lessons
• music lessons
• cell phones
• car payments

I had to live on just 30% of my gross income for 15 years after taxes, child support, and other kids' expenses were deducted. I had 30% of my salary to pay for my own mortgage, insurance, utility expenses, car payments, etc.

None of this is fair.

 

Yup, they were YOUR kids.....and you and your wife supported them and she took care of them every day....


Remind THEM not to have kids and save all that angst about paying for something they created

 

You missed the point. It went over your head. I don't have the time to break it down for you.

 

It's a monthly reminder of how you should keep yer penis in yer pants even when married.

 

I have been a single parent twice and I never wanted any money from them, in fact, I never wanted to see them again...

 

Maybe you should try thinking about it from the kids' perspectives??? Pro-life advocates SHOULD hold consistent attitudes concerning moral responsibility for their own children, at least.

 

Child support is not fair at all. But theres not any way to make it much better without shifting most of the unfairness onto the kid(s), or taking parents rights away and transferring them to the state. Its a shyt sammich we just gotta eat.

Afterthought:

Parents with acceptible living conditions and no evidence of abuse or neglect should have the right to 50/50 custody. In 50/50 custody, all necessary costs should be shared and no child support payed.

 

Learn to work the system like she did..It may have benefited you..only if you regretted your children.

If not...How are they doing?

 

I know what you are saying...my husband went through something very similar. The resentment is very poisonous within the relationship between the ex's when you have this type of...one spouse handing over the money to the other...and that spouse can do whatever the hell they want to do with it.

My stepson went thru a custody battle with his son, and his arrangement with his ex is totally different. The judge gave true joint custody. The child has two homes and half the time he's at his mom and half the time he's at his dad's. No one pays child support. I wasn't sure this would be stable enough for my grandson but it's been working for several years.

 

The kids are adults now. They're fine.

Two problems:

1) She left the family; she never should have been given custody.
2) She didn't use the child support money for the kids. She wouldn't even buy them food. So I had to step in and pay for their food and clothes when that should have been covered by the child support.

 

You understand.

 

So some how you saved you credit score...paying child support..not supporting what you made, or the chick was a straight B$%tch, whom you sure to make her live to regret it to the benefit of whom?

Or Your are a stand up dude...or, you now free..

What are the kids on...medication now?

 

Yes, I do. And I totally respect you for the support and selfless love you showed your children. It's a tough thing to go thru.

 

If you have a kid, you are financially responsible to take care of it. You can't just dump your kid on a woman and then just run away and take no responsibility.

 

deleted.

 

Men are seriously oppressed when it comes to family court matters period..

 

I always saw my kids as well worth it, but I also got lucky. My ex wanted me involved in their lives at least as much as she wanted my money. I wanted to be around them more than I wanted to keep the money.

I suspect I will have a better relationship with all three of them, than if I had been a deadbeat or one of those whiner Dads always asking if this is 'fair'. You can't be asking yourself this question very much even in the privacy of your own head, without those kids sensing it.

 

Except it's not really fair, even if you're able to gin up and bare with it, as your case happened to be. The only way out of this mess really is to set aside a joint account for the child's well being and stick money in it, so that when the breakup happens "This is what that joint account is for."