Well, you could say that I never really saw or experienced the ‘patriarchy’. The man as the ‘head of the family’ didn’t exist in my childhood. The man contending with a sort of fierce force of nature -- whose submission to any kind of instruction not aligned with her own agenda was minimal -- this was probably closer to reality. That’s probably not politically correct but there we go, it's true. The man who earned one pound for every 80 pence his spouse earned, or the man who expected his wife to cook and clean, or the man who was even married, he also didn’t exist. My mother did what she wanted, was very successful, and my father is now glad to be retired while she continues to earn well. Essentially this spooky power dynamic espoused by feminist was difficult to identify in my close relationships. In fact it’s fair to say that nowhere in our family can it be observed -- like, not even close. You might say the opposite is true in some fashion. So it does feed into a discussion of power. In these intellectual spheres power is often conflated with income and wealth. OK well I was the only earner in my relationship -- did it mean Sheree had no power? You don't know Sheree, but anyone who does would smirk at that question. Yes housewives really do have power and influence, and men really are beholden to that in myriad ways. Just because he drives a taxi 12 hours a day doesn't mean he 'wears the trousers'. I say ‘housewives’ because of the conflation of money and power. But really the broader reality is women do have power which isn’t really accounted for in the traditional theory of patriarchy; at least so far as I can tell. Y’know, who raises you? Who are the adult figures at nursery? Who are your teachers predominantly up until secondary school? You really think the female authority figure isn’t by that stage mapped out and established? OK so yeah the archetypal female authority figure was mapped out for me just fine. And if you were looking for a reason why the men in my family sought after strong, imposing women it is probably that. Who was I afraid of as a child? Who dished out the beatings? -- no it wasn't dad. Indeed if my mum felt like knocking him upside the head then she would, and no one would care because... why would they? I should add that my mum is black and my dad is white -- oh no, my story really doesn't fit the narrative. In my case all the above along with some other social pressures probably did lead to a mindset which accepted female dominance, even to the point of abuse, as just part and parcel of being a man. This works just the same way as male dominance might be traditionally mapped out for girls… we’re just witnessing pendulum swings here -- or probably more accurately just different spheres of power dynamics. My general thrust on this subject is that power and dominance is infinitely more complicated than one could glean merely from a basic understanding of patriarchy. My final thought is that we have a tendency to become that which we fight against; and nowhere is this more true than in feminism (the women fighting misogyny can quite easily give into misandry, the anti-fascist can become the fascist, the civil right activist becomes the racist etc etc etc I see this literally every day, in fact fighting against these things, paradoxically, appears to be the only occupation in which such behaviour is actually accepted, even in the mainstream).