Ask AboveAlpha anything you want.

Discussion in 'Humor & Satire' started by AboveAlpha, Jul 1, 2016.

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  1. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    Well....there really is only one replacement for me and I trained him.

    And I wasn't judging you.

    AA
     
  2. Deckel

    Deckel Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    And he will be replaced eventually too. This is a Never-Ending Story

    Wouldn't really matter to me if you did. I am just here wasting time while the other Never Ending Story--laundry--goes round and round.
     
  3. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    Let me ask YOU something?

    Where the F@#K do all the matching socks go???

    I mean I put them into the dryer in pairs and somehow at least one of each pair escapes!!

    AA
     
  4. Deckel

    Deckel Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    They never made it to the dryer. They went over the tub in the washer, down the overflow canister where they were chewed up and sent down the drain. I just buy black tube socks and let them double duty as dress socks too. I never notice one missing.
     
  5. Aleksander Ulyanov

    Aleksander Ulyanov Well-Known Member

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    That is god's truth. I used to work in a laundromat and we had to clean out the machine that chopped everything up for the sewer about once a month. It was mainly chopped up socks, if I'm lyin' I'm dyin'

    Use the low water setting and you'll never lose hosiery again.
     
  6. scarlet witch

    scarlet witch Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    I only wear thigh hi's and they can be a nightmare to find, I use a laundry hosiery bag like this one and never have a problem... suppose you can put your socks in it too :)

    [​IMG]
     
  7. Jim Rockford

    Jim Rockford Banned

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    Where are you located? Does your job make you mobile? What is your job? How do I get that job? PM if you like.
     
  8. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    OK...continued.....

    Most embarrassing moment in your life?......As I already started to explain I am at a International Lioness Fashion Show for Charity and my Mom is President and there are mostly female models but a few men as they are walking down a runway with all these beautiful cloths designed by the worlds top Fashion designers and I am there to help and support and I KNOW ABSOLUTELY ZERO ABOUT TH WORLD OF FASHION!! LOL!!

    So basically I am pretending to look busy while I eat Warm Brie on crackers and downing raw oysters and drinking my Jack and Diet Coke when all of a sudden my Mom runs up to me and say's...."One of the designers..(Name I had no idea at the time who or what this person was)....want's to talk to you now!!"

    So I go backstage and there are mostly half naked women getting dressed and putting on makeup and this lady comes up to me and say's...."TOO TALL!! This will never work!!"....and I say..."Huh?"

    Next thing I know some Gay guy and his also Gay assistant.....after reading this for awhile members will understand the whole GAYNESS of this story......come up to me on both sides one takes my drink and the other pulls my Rayban sunglasses out of my suits vest pocket and say's...."Darling you should NEVER put anything into that pocket as it just stretches that little tight pocket out so much it can barely stand it."

    Again I go...."Huh???"

    The next thing I know they have my jacket, vest, and as one begins to unbutton my shirt the other gay guy say's...."No time....I will get in front and you get in back and we will just both...." I yell...."WAIT JUST ONE F@#KING MINUTE!!".....loudly.

    Everyone and I mean EVERYONE backstage just stops. I say...."What the F@#K is going on!!?"

    The designer lady had left to I have absolutely no idea where so this overly....WAY OVERLY effeminate gay male fashionista looks at me and does this sort of dip and puts the top of his hand held at a 90 degree angle to his am under his chin and say's....."Don't you know sweetie? Daniel is out sick so your our new MODEL!"

    This is NOT a made up story.....this actually happened....and I have NEVER been the same since! LOL!!

    What's the reason you don't smoke weed?....Well I don't like to smoke to begin with as I am a runner but as well I don't like how pot slows down my thought processes.

    Why do you so often state the obvious?......because this is a psychological tactic that conditions another individual as when a person might hear what you said but because either their knowledge base is too limited or perhaps their ideology is too primitive by sheer REPETITION the human brain once taking in repetitive sensory data into the subconscious will begin to build multiple and stronger neural pathways that begin to CEMENT what I am saying into their subconscious which is where all sensory data is stored and thus it becomes part of a person and makes it easier for those who protest reality accept reality eventually.

    AA
     
  9. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    Blondes or brunettes?.....BOTH!! LOL!! Preferably at the same time.

    How does an ordinary day in the life of Alpha look?......Well I am retired so I get up....I eat 6 to 8 eggs over easy with 2 pieces of multiple whole grain toast with butter along with half a pound of bacon....Orange Juice, Water, Milk, a Yogurt, slice of Watermelon and a Multivitamin, Joint Supplements and then I USUALLY....I am injured now and recovering buy usually I will go run as I run every day 6 miles one day and 11 miles the next and I run at least 1 or 2 of the 20 Km's a month.

    I get back shower and on an off day jump in my pool on an on day go to our local Boys and Girls Club and swim a mile in their 100 meter pool.....I do that 2 times a week.

    I get back or get out of my pool and do my weight training as different days I work out on different muscle groups.

    Then I check me E-Mails and other things I can't talk about.....OH...I forgot I feed my cat...Little SOB!! Right before I make breakfast.....or sometimes the girls next door will show up and feed my cat and feed me too.

    Then if I feel like it I will check my stocks and then drive to our companies offices and basically turn myself into one big nuance!! LOL!!

    I will then go have lunch either home or out at a restaurant and I dig Oysters or Seafood and I usually will have at least 1 maybe 2 Extra-Dry Vodka Martini's Straight Up.....one drop of Vermouth in a chilled glass and I ask the drop be swirled around and then dumped out then pour the chilled vodka and add 3 large green olives with pimento.

    Then I will come back home....handle any new dramas for the company.....maybe play some guitar.....then maybe set up the grill for dinner.....I have to eat at least 7500 calories a day not to lose weight but as I am injured I have been eating the same but I gained 2 lbs to go from 238 lbs to 240.

    Then after dinner I go do a few more things on the non-civy internet and then go on PF perhaps....same old same old.

    Finish the sentence "Ritter is..F@#KING AWESOME DUDE!!!"

    LOL!!

    AA

    - - - Updated - - -

    Why you little minx!! LOL!!

    AA
     
  10. Zorroaster

    Zorroaster Well-Known Member

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    What is the role of consciousness in the collapse of the quantum state vector?
     
  11. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    OK....here is the thing....Conscious observation results in Wave Form Collapse but as well it Locks in Function and Value.

    BUT.....the extent of Consciousness is still being determined.

    D-Wave....a Company that develops and sells 1000 and 5000 Quibit Quantum Computers and they just sold one to Google a short while back is also a U.S. Military Contractor but the extent is somewhat up for debate.

    D-Wave had 8 of it's first robotically assembled 100 Quibit Quantum Processors which D-Wave made a DIGITAL VIDEO of their robotic construction but NO ONE was allowed to watch the video and D-Wave placed then in storage for 4 years and after 4 years they were brought out and 2 members of D-Wave watched a video that showed the first 4 being assembled and the MOMENT THE VIDEO OF THEIR ASSEMBLY HAS WATCHED THE 4 100 QUIBIT QUANTUM PROCESSORS STOPPED CALCULATING OR FUNCTIONING UPON THE QUANTUM LEVEL!!!

    The men then took a clear plastic cup and taped it to a computer screen and they placed the timer to start running the beginning of the start of the next video so they could leave the room and that was to detail the construction of the next 2...#5 and #6 out of a total of 8....and they put a HOUSE FLY UNDER THE CUP!!

    The video ran and the #5 and #6 100 Quibit Quantum Processors also stopped functioning.

    I don't know what they have planned for the last 2.

    AA
     
  12. DennisTate

    DennisTate Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    To at least some degree......

    this fits with my strong suspicion that many creatures are far far far more

    sentient and intelligent..... and emotional......

    than we give them credit for being........

    The condensed version of "The Secret Life of Plants" was
    interesting reading..........

    Consciousness..... in at least some form...... may go down into far smaller
    particles than we might tend to imagine........

    even quarks could have something of a "Ariba, ariba..... undale..... undale.... yeee haw... yee haw....." approach to life
    like Speedy Gonzales.... The Road Runner on the Bugs Bunny cartoons.......... no matter which direction those quarks happen to turn in.......
     
  13. DennisTate

    DennisTate Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Oh.... after my hernia operation a few weeks ago.......

    all that I took for pain relief was MSM.......

    first day 15,000mgms.... second day 20,000 mgms... third day 20,000 mgms again.. and then by
    the fourth day.... back down to my usual daily dose of about 5000 mgms or so.........

    I would not take the hydro-morphone / (dolotid).... that I was prescribed as a pain killer....

    because I had a nasty reaction to that stuff back in 2013... after my other hernia operation.......

    Twenty years at forestry........

    I did some damage to myself.......

    not as much damage as you have done though!

    No full fledged NDE's or flat lining for me......


    http://www.politicalforum.com/health-care/440818-msm-been-using-sixteen-years-great-results.html

    MSM... been using it for sixteen years.... great results!
     
  14. Cosmo

    Cosmo Well-Known Member

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    Best of luck; and wishing you a speedy recovery.
     
    AboveAlpha likes this.
  15. Ritter

    Ritter Well-Known Member

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    In my sleeplessness, I have decided to make you some more random and weird questions to answer for us...

    - What calms you down?
    - You said you work out and run, would you have liked to be a professional athlete?
    - How stupid do you think Mrs. Clinton is?
    - Do you feel your status as "above alpha" might be threatened by Trump? When will yuou challenge him to an "alph off" and wiill it be broadcasted on TV?
    - Who was your childhood hero?
    - Are you a little sh-t?
    -Do you soometimes make up stories about random people just for fun?
    - Where do you see the world in 15 years?
    - What kind of idiots did you hang out with most receently?
    - Wouldn't we all be better off without any alphas?
    - Did you find these questions as retarded as I did?

    Cheers!
     
  16. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    OK.....

    What calms you down?......sex with a good woman.

    You said you work out and run, would you have liked to be a professional athlete?.....Well when I was a little younger than I am now I was raising money for one of my charities I have created and I was picking up a donation at a place called Team Link which was a Martial Arts Studio I met UFC Champion Gabriel Gonzaga....or Gabby as I call him and I am the ONLY person who can get away with calling him Gabby.

    LINK....https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabriel_Gonzaga

    LINK....https://gabrielgonzaga.wordpress.com/category/team-link/

    I had never met Gabby before and I had no idea who he was and was just there to pick up the donation and the guy's at Team Link who KNOW I am beyond well trained in a wide number of Martial Arts as well as the fact I am one of a VERY small number of American's who was allowed to be a part of an exchange program with the Russian Military and thus I am also proficient in Systema and Sambo.

    The guy's at Team Link introduced us and we smiled and shook hands and that is when my buddy at Team Link suggested I ask Gabby i he would like to make a donation as he told me Gabby had won the UFC or Ultimate Fighting Championship.

    I shook Gabby's hand again and told him I thought that was quite an achievement and I asked him if he might be interested in making a donation to a Charity and program I developed and created that involves school kids at the early Jr High level as we donate materials to allow kids to help BUILD a number of worthwhile projects that benefit the town and businesses and the kids work hand in hand with Business Owners, Legislatures, Police, Fireman...etc....on such projects as installing Holiday Trees or working to clean up areas or working to help the elderly....etc....and when the project is done we set the kids up with a big party to thank them with food and pizza and soda and candy and we even have a DJ and a band.

    Kids who help you BUILD something TOGETHER....are much less likely to tear or rip things down and destroy them.....thus we have almost completely eradicated vandalism and littering in this area.

    I explained exactly the same story to Gabby and he agreed to donate $100.

    One of the guy's at Team Link who knows what I am said....."Hey....&%$#@*#.....why don't you guy's fight for it and the loser has to place a $100 donation in the Winners name as well as the loser has to donate a $100 himself in his name!!"

    Now Gabby is a really nice guy but with Killer Instinct and well....I am just a killer.

    Gabby didn't want to hurt me so he said..."No no no....we can't....".

    And THEN.....Gabby's friend who KNOWS me showed up and he convinced Gabby to get into the contest and the rules were....First guy who goes down on his back loses or a guy can give up.

    Gabby was really worried he might hurt me and he really is a good guy but as his buddies at Team Link convinced Gabby that I was no pushover he decided to do it and we both took off our shoes and socks as well as took off our shirts and we got on the mats at the Martial Arts Studio and the guy's at Team Link said they would sound the bell to start the contest.

    Now Gabby to his credit had absolutely no idea what I am and after the bell rang and Gabby ended up on his back on the mat looking up at me in about 3 seconds he immediately looked up at me and said...."I wasn't ready!!"

    I said..."OK....I know you weren't as you didn't expect that at all from me did you?"

    Gabby said no....good naturally and I helped him up and we started again except this time as I was up $200 for my charity Gabby agreed that if he won this time I would pay the $200 plus he would add in another $200.

    The bell rang again and this time Gabby was ready and we circled each other a bit and Gabby went for a back of the knee leg sweet and attempted to push me backwards and down with himself falling atop me in an attempt to get me on my back.

    When he wrapped his left calve around the back of my knee I used my right hand to reach under and across to his right hand and placed my right hand upon the top of his right hands thumb with my right hands fingers pressed and holding his right hands palm and the palm of my right hand wrapped around and pressed and holding the top of his right hands thumb to just below the knuckle of that hands middle finger and then I pulled with my right arm curling it and down while reversing my backwards motion and uncoiling my slightly and purposely backwards falling stance to a launch in, at and below Gabby's right arm to reverse to pressure of the hold thus bringing him DOWN VERY HARD on his back with his right arm being controlled in my pressure nerve submission hold.

    Gabby was really surprised.

    I was now up $400 for my Charity and as I really laid Gabby out now he was mad and said that he would pay the $400 for the donation but this time for $500.

    Gabby got me GOOD that 3rd time!! LOL!! I really felt that one as he dropped me but GOOD! LOL!!

    When I started to laugh a bit he asked if I would be interested in doing it one more time and if he won we together would pay out $1500...$750 each for the charity in HIS name and if I won it would go in my name.

    I agreed.....we both REFUSED to go down so after about 20 minutes the guys from Team Link called it a draw as they had Little Kids and their Mom's coming in and at that point it had begun to look like a BLOOD SPORT!! LOL!!

    So.....I guess I would become an UFC Figher.

    AA
     
  17. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    How stupid do you think Mrs. Clinton is?.....Stupid like a Fox!! I have no problems with a woman President just not her!! But Trump scares me as well.

    Do you feel your status as "above alpha" might be threatened by Trump? When will yuou challenge him to an "alph off" and will it be broadcasted on TV?.........LOL!! NO! lol....Ha!! LOL!! NO!!! TOO FUNNY!!

    Who was your childhood hero?.......Captain Kirk.

    Are you a little sh-t?.......Not at 6 foot 2 inches and 239 lbs I'm not.

    Do you sometimes make up stories about random people just for fun?.....Yes. but only as a Joke and I always state it is one.

    Where do you see the world in 15 years?........Orbiting 92.96 Million miles away from the sun.

    What kind of idiots did you hang out with most recently?.....lol.....OK...and this happened late last night. My two bi-sexual female neighbors threw an after-show 4th of July Party yesterday as I performed with my band in front of a very large crowd....about 31,000 I am told and it was an afternoon show for all ages outside.

    Now the night before I did not sleep as I had something that needed fixing and as I am trained to stay up for days and just catch that single 1 hour of sleep....I was fine for the show and we did very well and put on a good show.

    I had someone I really needed to and wanted to meet that late afternoon so I got home as soon as I could.

    I was able to catch that person but unfortunately something came up for them and we had to cut our meeting short and although I and this person I was to meet knew something might come up well.....you know how you might plan out something you REEEEEAAAALLLLYY enjoy doing but as in life sometimes things just don't work out right and then you overly anticipated expectations come crashing down??

    Yeah...yeah that pretty much covers it.

    Anyways we talked and thought our meeting might be rescheduled for later that day so we told each other if we can meet today great in not another day.

    I then went over to the girls party and I got very much unlike me...buzzed....as it is very hard for me get get drunk unless I am PURPOSELY downing water-glass sized drinks of 100% booze.

    So it had been a long couple of days so I DID start drinking and I won a few bucks from being in a drinking contest....but challengers beware....I have NEVER lost.

    I decided to go home as the girls live next door and I ended up actually having that meeting that I was supposed to have earlier and then in the middle of the meeting......WHAM!!!!

    The girls next door had sent a couple of guys to see if I had ice and these guys.....ie...LUG NUTS.....come walking over to ask me for ice and they are drunk and one of them is even DRUNKER!!! LOL!! And as he is walking towards my large sliding glass back door that allows one access into my over-sized kitchen he takes a swig of his beer and WALKS FACE FIRST INTO MY SLIDING GLASS DOORS!! LOL!!

    The glass is REALLY strong and this guy wastes his face and cuts his teeth and lip on the Beer can and almost KNOCKS HIMSELF OUT!! LOL!!

    I was posting on this forum when this happen and I think I detailed some of this out on the board!

    Wouldn't we all be better off without any alphas?.........Well....I will tell you what.....I think this is a questions the LADIES should answer!! Ladies? Would any fine woman like to chime in or add her opinion??

    Did you find these questions as retarded as I did? .....yes but I recently took an RPG Blast. What is your excuse?? LOL!

    AA
     
  18. Steve N

    Steve N Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Alpha, what sounds better, analog or digital? On the best systems I say analog.
     
  19. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    Yes...absolutely analog.

    Many people do not know that a CD recording only samples and reproduces just a TINY PERCENTAGE of the total sound recorded on VINYL!!

    AA
     
  20. cerberus

    cerberus Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Genuine sympathy AA.
     
  21. Deckel

    Deckel Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    .....Isn't "AA" someone else's signature?
     
  22. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    I don't understand that either???

    AA
     
  23. Deckel

    Deckel Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    If your socks aren't showing then maybe we have a Chinese knockoff
     
  24. Robert

    Robert Well-Known Member Past Donor

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    Have somebody who is an expert check those floor tile. Grout is missing.
     
  25. AboveAlpha

    AboveAlpha Well-Known Member

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    I think and many other people probably think this as well....that just ONE of me....is more than enough!!

    LOL!!

    AA
     
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