Tasteless Humor II The Second One.

Oi @Sallyally

 

John McCririck has died, what was the odds in that !!

 

It was a certainty.

 

A woman came in all mad at a shoesalesman.. told her husband to go down there and whip his ass..husband asked.. "what did he do?" she said "Well, while we were trying on shoes he got a glimpse up my skirt and said "I'd eat ice cream outta that!".
The husband replied.. "1st. I told you, you already have enough shoes, 2nd.. you oughta wear panties, and thirdly, if the SOB can eat that much ice cream, I ain't f***ing with him!"

 

Can't help it.



"Blaire White is an American transgender anti-feminist activist, known for her fiery views expressed through her YouTube Channel."

"Some of her quotes & opinions have attracted some criticism & controversy. These are considered to be some of her most controversial:

• Supporting fat shaming
• Thinking rape culture does not exist
• Not a huge believer in the gender pay gap
• Although she is transgender, she is against young people transitioning. She states the decision needs to be made by a healthy adult.
• Firmly believes that there are only 2 genders and has referred to those that calls themselves the non-binary gender as trans-retarded
• Opposed the “Black Lives Matter” movement, and had famously donned a ‘black face’ on YouTube to explain why
• She believes Islamophobia is reasonable in this day and age.
• She believes that feminine privilege is real, and refers to feminism as a cancer on this world.
• A defender of President Donald Trump, she was staunchly against Hilary Clinton, during the Presidential elections."

https://www.marathi.tv/youtube-host/blaire-white-biography/

Being even more conservative still, I call this guy a guy.

 

Here you go, tasteless and funny: A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all over the place, eating everything behind the bar. Then the monkey jumps on to the pool table and swallows a billiard ball. The bartender screams at the guy, "Your monkey just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!" "Sorry," replied the guy. "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. I'll pay for everything." The man finishes his drink, pays and leaves. Two weeks later, he's in the bar with his pet monkey, again. He orders a drink, and the monkey starts running around the bar. The monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his ass, pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks. "Yeah," replies the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures stuff first."

 

there's always the 'exception to the rule'...

that said, does it still have a dick?

 

Two things

1) It's a good joke

2) My mother is 78, the joke is older than my mother

 

I have to admit I am having a hard time seeing a dude there..so good question.. does it still have a dick?

 

We definitely have a thing - strong sexual chemistry. She makes excuses to lean across my field of view so we can be close. She was making fake excuses as to why I need to be there when I was planning to work at home.

But no way is anything going to happen... unless she throws herself at me. Maybe she's in an open marriage. Maybe he's a closet gay and soon to come out. Okay, almost no way is anything going to happen.

Honest to god, I'm falling in love. LOL!!! Dammit!!! And she lights up when she sees me each day. I'm sure I do as well. The funny part is, when I first met her, I commented that I feel sorry for the man who married her. But the fact is, I'd bet she is a hell of a lot of fun. But oh well. there is hardly any way anything is going to happen. Not likely. Hardly ever think about it.

 

Just remember.. if she'll cheat on him, she'll cheat on you too.

 

I don't worry about monogamy. I'm also 30 years older than her.

I'm obsessing but wouldn't want her to endanger her marriage. But I am falling in love, nonetheless. And I'd have to say she is as well. In fact I know it. At the least, she has a crush.

We do have amazing chemistry. We've been working closely for about nine months now and we just keep getting closer every day.

 

But I hardly ever think about ripping her clothes off, bending her...

 

Had some sad local news as our ice cream man was found dead today. His head was covered with sprinkles and chocolate sauce
.
.
.
Police believe he may have topped himself!

 

Try a coffee date first.

 

Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready.

"I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it's the best we can do and you will have to share the room with others" he is told by the doorman.

Einstein says that this is no problem at all and that there is no need to make such a great fuss. So the doorman leads him to the dorm. They enter and Albert is introduced to all of the present inhabitants. "See, Here is your first room mate. He has an IQ of 180!"

"That's wonderful!" says Albert. "We can discuss mathematics!"

"And here is your second room mate. His IQ is 150!"

"That's wonderful!" says Albert. "We can discuss physics!"

"And here is your third room mate. His IQ is 100!"

"That's wonderful! We can discuss the latest plays at the theater!"

Just then another man moves out to capture Albert's hand and shake it. "I'm your last room mate and I'm sorry, but my IQ is only 80."

Albert smiles back at him and says "So, where do you think interest rates are headed?"

 

What?

 

Smells.

 

I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today. The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in

 

People claim that they're in recycling these days but have a look at their faces when you wash a condom out.

 

Madonna is 50 but she's got the body of a man half her age.

 

Not as bad as when you hang tampons to dry on the line.

 

Yeah, except she’s 60.

 

We've already had about 50. And two-dozen lunches.

And I know what she wants. I can feel it. But I hardly ever think about it...