Does someone's weight affect your perception of them?

Weight lifting requires a lot of dedication and hard work. It's also a great stress reliever. Many people love working towards a goal year in and year out. They love to see their body transform and perform better. I don't think most people realize how much dedication and planning it takes to become truly developed.

Walking won't get you fit. If you eat reasonably well then you'll stay skinny, but you won't be anywhere close to "fit" (unless your elderly). Some people love to push the envelope and see what their body is capable of.

 

I think this thread, like many others, is plagued with people disagreeing upon too loose a term to begin with. It has become "cut" vs "morbidly obese", when the great majority are neither. To go further we need a common denominator. Are you just talking judgement of morbidly obese people? I can't help but feel sorry for those people. Very rarely do you come across a human without a vice, and to have eating be your vice is an extremely hard one in a superficial society. No covering that up.
As for women, they aren't visual creatures like men are. When women want a lay they are attracted to game more than anything. When they want a husband, security.
As for treating the pretty girl good and the ugly girl poorly, that is what the 99% of sucker fish do. The guy who is good a getting women knows to do the opposite of the crowd. Most men see a pretty girl, kiss her ass, fall in love, and make love to her if they're lucky enough to get a shot. The guy who knows women, treats the pretty girl like crap and humps her like a hooker. She is in love with him. He treats the plain Jane like a princess and makes love to her. She is in love with him.

 

I'm talking about people that are more than 20-30 pounds over weight. I'm also more "forgiving" of people once they hit their late 40s when its natural to put on some weight.

I think you'll find women are almost as turned off by overweight men as men are of overweight women. In my experience, women won't actually say this, but their actions show it to be true.

 

Affirmative action for fat people. Everyone between the ages of 17 and 70 will have to have 10% of the sexual encounters with morbidly obese people.

The federal government is hiring people over 400 pounds to ride on airplanes and teach tolerance to everyone.

The bad news is the federal government is going to tax fat people by the pound.

 

There is probably some truth to that. Though men have higher metabolism rates, so an overweight man is the exception, where as once you hit a certain age, the skinny woman is the exception. I have heard in other countries women dig overweight guys. Probably varies per culture, age groups, economic brackets. The fat guy in high school isn't getting laid in America. But men have angles to work that women just don't have. Lots of women use men to get things they want. A man in a position to supply something a woman wants will get women. Obviously not any women, but with 7 billion people on earth, he will get laid. Ever saw Shania Twain's husband? That dude wasn't fat, but ugly as sin. But he was in a position to make her famous, so she was his. No, the fat kid in high school isn't getting laid without an angle. But if he has pounds of weed, bet your ass he'll have a girlfriend more consistently than a football player. Angles. Game. Societal status. Money. I honestly wish men didn't just go off looks with women. It is truly why so many shallow ones are out there with the depth of puddles. You obviously like the gorgeous women. I was done chasing high maintenance women by my late 20's. I don't know how old you are, but eventually you'll seek relationships where it's about as much as they do for you as them.

 

Women naturally have higher body fat percentages but aren't really anymore prone to being above their healthy body weight.

All of what you say has some truth to it. However, at least in middle/upper-middle class America, things are changing. I live in the Northeast in a city with a plethora of successful college educated women. A woman with her own career, ambitions, and money isn't going to chase after some guy because he has money or weed. There seem to be a lot of single "high-powered" women in their late 20s and early 30s here. I think a lot of men are intimidated by them because they can change the age old dynamic of a relationship. These women seem pretty content to rely on themselves and have the occasional fling.

 

No they don't - and they don't choose to overeat either, because choosing to engage in complusive behavior is self-contradictory.

 

When are people responsible for themselves? When does personal responsibility kick in? Most people love sex and have a compulsion to it. Does that mean they're not responsible for raping people?

 

It's a tough question, not sure I have an easy answer. We blame folks who indulge in cigarettes for the consequences of their actions while we call those who indulge in alcohol victims. I suppose the answer is as personal and as varied as their are degrees of compulsion. The line is the same as the one between a hard choice and no choice. It's a line that may only be visible to the person faced with it, a line that most of us are less than honest about admitting even to ourselves.​

 

Seems to me there are two perspectives about personal responsibility: individual and societal. From the former perspective, the addict may consider himself responsible in the sense of being a free agent, but he kids himself by making excuses for it, as if he knows why he does it. From the latter, society must hold people responsible for acts that violate the rights of others, ideally by meting out such punishment as will give the perpetrator pause to reflect, rather than merely satisfy our craving for vengeance. IOW, we hold him responsible in the sense that we don't tolerate his violation of others' rights even if "the devil made me do it", not in the sense of looking down our collective nose at him.

 

Being uninformed of what? Also, being judgmental doesn't really start until one's opinion of somebody as suggested by his appearance doesn't change despite evidence to the contrary, which is not what I am advocating for.

I never once mentioned that obsession with fitness was virtuous in my earlier post, which I believe you are straw-manning. Being obsessed with fitness can be equally annoying, and your logic also seems to allow the judgement that I said is permissible.

 

I don't know but they're certainly not responsible for using birth control, caring for the babies they conceive, or supporting their off-spring financially.

 

walking is the exercise that is most recommended by doctors. it is one of the best forms of cardiovascular exercise and it DOES make a difference.

if people want to go to the gym thats fine, but quite frankly, if you want to get fit/stay fit, walking will do the trick.

as you get older it is good to do some weight bearing exercises for the uppoer body, but this doesn't have to be a workout in a gym.

 

Doctors recommend walking because it's risk free and very easy to do. There are plenty of far superior excercises out there like biking, rowing, running, weight lifting, HIT interval training etc. etc. Just walking won't get you anywhere near what you can get out of your body. Both in terms of health and performance.

A 65 year old that walks 1 mile a day is definitely what I would consider fit. A 25 year old that walks 3 miles a day isn't anywhere near "fit."

 

When fat people refuse to diet, instead choosing to eat crap all day, they are making a choice to the size of a whale.

Overeating is a choice, so is being obese - in 99% of cases.

 

The great majority of "skinny" people make no effort to be skinny. The great majority actually have trouble gaining weight even when they try. This issue isn't so black and white as people are making it out to be. If you had to exercise your ass off all day long just to still be classified as "big boned" and "ugly", you aren't going to even try in the end. Physically fit and/or cut is a whole different matter altogether. But I tell you now, if someone's self perception is that they are ugly no matter what, they will not try regardless of how many other people feel they should. If society as a whole took all the pressure and value out of looks, the weight would come off of everyone. I know it sounds like the opposite, but it is the God's honest truth. It is that pressure that causes people to eat more and more out of sheer depression and hopelessness.

 

since we are talking about normal levels of fitness, walking is the most suitable form of exercise for the majority of people.

I accept that gym junkies might not think so.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/walking/HQ01612

see also

http://www.medicinenet.com/walking/article.htm

http://www.sharecare.com/question/is-walking-good-exercise

 

You have to love it. Fat people make no effort to be fat and neither do skinny people. Nobody is responsible for anything any more.

Some people jeopardize their health by being incredibily fat and some by being incredibily skinny. When I was supervising an operation of mostly women I had one hugely fat person and one anorexic person. In fact, the number of people who would sit on half my seat if they were next to me in a plane are probably about as common as anorexic/bulemic people. Perhaps it's two sides of the same coin.

 

You know you have met plenty of people that couldn't get obese if they tried. I'm not saying this is the case for all. However, someone whose DNA is that of "big boned" at their skinniest, who still wont attract a lover regardless, has little incentive outside of a pat on the back to get skinny. People don't work out for pats on the back. They work out for blow jobs.

 

both problems are based on psychological factors.

superskinny generally have poor self esteem, and overweight tend to as well, but the latter generally show poorer internal locus of control.

there is also usually a higher incidence of psychiatric disorders among the morbidly obese from what I understand, but this can sometimes be due to the medications they are on.

 

A morbidly obese person has given up hope in themselves of attracting a lover. It is a lack of hope that caused the overeating coping mechanism to kick in. It doesn't matter if they are pretty at their best form or not, what matters is what's going on in their head. Their perception. If we as a society stressed all kinds of factors in making a person sexy, they wouldn't be held hostage by the fact they feel they're ugly anyway. They could still get a lover turned on by honesty, integrity, compassion, conscientiousness, etc. They would have hope, and no need for the coping mechanism that is over eating. Even those who want to help them are still putting an emphases on looks, and in the grand scheme of things, encouraging the problem.

Take for instance some guy on the biggest loser. He works his ass off, learns tons of techniques to lose the weight and keep it off. He is now at his best. He hits the scene, and finds not one women who is attracted to him anyway. He tells himself, "oh yeah, that's why I didn't give a (*)(*)(*)(*). Must have forgot." It is the superficiality of our society that is the problem, not the morbidly obese person at the table. Get rid of the superficiality, the morbidly obese would disappear.

 

rubbish.

you don't get morbidly obese overnight.

it usually starts as a gradual increase in weight.

however, your comment re the superfciality of society is something I agree with - in fact, a lot of normal weight people also don't believe they are attractive because they don't look like airbrushed photos with perfect bodies.

 

Walking works, but it is less effective than almost any type of excercise out there. You need to really raise hour heart rate and utilize your muscles to become fit. This is why not athletes in the world incorporate walking into their routines.

 

That's crap. Being big boned means you have a wider frame, broader shoulders, and a propensity for building muscle and fat. With excercise anyone can get an attractive body.

 

Anyone with a healthy body and good grooming can be at least somewhat attractive looking. Even if someone has terrible facial aesttics, by presenting themselves well they can often overcome it.