Why did your spouse divorce you?

Were it not for me actually getting sick & tired of only really thinking about the eventual Death, or Life in Prison thing, & not wishing to be 100% gone from my daughter either way, Well, you see where I'd be.

 

Well at least you got a daughter out of it.

Hopefully better behaved than her mom.

 

One thing's certain.

She's far better than her CML. She's a much better fighter, than not only her parents, but just about anyone I have ever, or likely will ever, meet.

 

The one I was dating and engaged to who was cheating, it was easy just to dump her.

Had we been married and she was pulling that kind of sh!t then I would have just moved into a different bedroom in the house and then started cheating on her.

I believe in tit for tat and quid pro quo.

I don't believe in murder.

I don't mind killing someone in self defense or defending another, but not murder.

Even if someone deserved to be murdered I still would not murder them.

 

Yeah, my Ex & I were a different sort.

Long story, but right 'Round the end there, we were both in the same Institution, awaiting trial.

She'd started off as an "Unindicted Co-Conspirator, but when she refused ultimately, to testify against me, (We had been unmarried at the time of the charges... Another long story, involving RICO, but whatever) she ended up locked up too.

Our daughter 2 months old at the time, went to stay with her sister & husband, (My Partner) until I got out..... 6 months before she did.

 

Today it sadly rises up to 30's.

 

So she went down for you? WOW...

 

But it's when you're not doing those activities that can be the problem; I mean you can't sit at home talking about them all the time? It's a good way to meet, of course, but a relationship is meant to last thru thick and thin. For example, through choice I don't have many true friends but the few I do have are fellas. I just feel more at ease with guys.

 

I'm surprised HereWeGoAgain hasn't showed up for this thread.

 

Well you fall in love in strange places.

I met all my babes at activity clubs -- dancing, sports, social, etc.

Never been arrested or in jail. Never want to be.

Keep all the laws of God and man and then it should be easy to stay out of jail -- most of the time.

 

She went down WITH me, WE went down, for someone else.

 

... Meet the Internet !!

 

or nobody is stupid enough?

 

I meant she refused to testify against you and took the rap instead of making a deal that's all. Maybe I misread? If so, I apologize. In any case is must have been a horrendous time for you.

 

I don't think people that forge long time relationships whether married or not are all stupid. Some couples actually grow in their relationship especially if both are committed. Commitment today is seen as temporary by many and that's too bad IMO. I believe there is nothing better than having a loving, committed relationship with one who is also loving and committed to you. You wind up living for each other and supporting each other through thick and thin, through perils and fights, etc. Sex becomes a deeper pleasure as well. Even as they age, committed couples find ways to satisfy each other.

I understand the reluctance to commit to another person. It's scary for sure. If I became single today I think I would just stay single until I die. I grew up in another time when marriage and commitment were more valued than they are today.

 

In my case we just crossed that line, when one of us dont behave as in the beginning, so the end off our relationships was too obviously for us both. We came to local attorney, so all paper work and billings dont touched us, simply got divorced in good relations.

 

In some cases such as one here, only the lady needs to have been committed to a mental institution.

 

You asking me that question mate?
The answer is because most of us holy men don't do "cloying relationship" or "family man".
Here's me under my wargaming name 'PoorOldSpike', note the awesome body language that sends out the clear message- "I don't need no nagging wife and noisy smelly kids"..

 

It just seems odd never to have had a long term relationship, defined as a year or more.

Most people end up in one of these by 30.

Then another one about every 5 or 10 years.

The tricky question then becomes why did they break it off?

The answer is usually that they finally discovered something about the other that was intolerable or else they just got tired of each other.

The most interesting question later is do they regret breaking it off ?? Yes or no ?? And why ??

Your situation is completely different -- why never ?? That's your question.

At any rate that's what you said.

 

This is the million dollar answer !!!

This is precisely why people should take their time and not rush into anything in less than at least a year if not 2.

Good answer !!!

 

Creepy..

 

It's cool. I'd had a bad night, & took the reply the "wrong" way.

Yeah, it was a right mess there for a while.

 

We holy men don't do "most people"..

 

Why did she ? Oh, I don't know...

The late nights without a call or excuse..

The calls from other women...

The debt collectors...

The drinking...

The gambling...

The jail time...

The associations with the mob...

After all that she was involved with, I wonder why I didn't leave first.

Hindsight is 20/20

 

I was married once, when I was in the military for the benefits. A lot of people think that's wrong, and I did, but I put it like this - I was doing the same work as the guy next to me, usually actually doing more and doing a better job of it, but I was literally getting paid less than half as much as him. Why? Because I didn't have a ring on my finger. We had one guy in our division that was so beyond useless it was often easier to get a job done if we somehow managed to get rid of him, yet this guy was literally getting paid more than twice as much because he had a wife.

We broke off for the dumbest of reasons. She was a friend of mine, really just a friend. I wanted the extra cash and to help her out, so I was going to split it with her. After a while she wanted something for real, and I was firm that at that time I wasn't looking for anything more. So she said she didn't want anything from me. Which, well, was fine by me, and the divorce proceedings took a while, so I mean - it kinda worked out.

I've had weird luck dating. Most women I've dated wanted something really serious, which I don't mind commitment, but they were looking for it way too fast. I've always wanted a family, but my parents had kids way too early and I've been pretty adamant about avoiding that until I'm ready to support a family. I remember being very young and being super frugal about everything because I knew my parents didn't have the money, so when we'd go school shopping I'd buy shoes and clothes for the year for less than $100, almost entirely from the clearance section - of my own volition. I don't want my kids to have that.